Episode 249: Artemis
/Introducing our newest segment: It’s All Greek to Me - Finally Fulfilling the Promise of Spirits Podcast, by Spirits Podcast. And of course we’re starting off with Julia’s favorite goddess from when she first picked up Edith Hamilton’s Mythology: Artemis!
Content Warning: This episode contains conversations about or mentions of sexual harassment and assault, murder, death, pregnancy, birth, misogyny, hunting, animal death, human sacrifice, virginity, heteronormativity, maiming, child abandonment/endangerment, grief, fratricide, death in childbirth, mutilation, and kidnapping/abduction.
Housekeeping
- Recommendation: This week, Julia recommends The Long Island Monster Gallery.
- Books: Check out our previous book recommendations, guests’ books, and more at spiritspodcast.com/books
- Call to Action: Check out HORSE: A podcast about ridiculous stories, internet drama, and some of the biggest and baddest personalities out there today—all from the world of basketball.
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Transcript
AMANDA: Welcome to Spirits Podcast, a boozy dive into mythology, legends, and folklore. Every week we pour a drink and learn about a new story from around the world. I'm Amanda.
JULIA: And I'm Julia.
AMANDA: And this is Episode 249: Artemis, the first installment of our new mini-series. Oh, what's that? What am I hearing? Are those the hooves of Pegasus? It's “It's All Greek To Me.” Finally fulfilling the promise of Spirits podcast by Spirits podcast.
JULIA: So, we recently had a little, like, Spirits work meeting and I was like, "Hey, guys. What if we just did finally all of the Olympian gods?" And Amanda and Eric both looked at me and they're like, "Finally." It's like, "Oh, okay."
AMANDA: It's been five and a half years and we're finally fulfilling the promise of Spirits Podcast, where we take you through Zeus the Father and all his friends and, and tell you what they're up to, up there on Mount Olympus.
JULIA: So, we've done Hades and Persephone. We've done Zeus, and now it's finally time to hit all the other 11 Olympian gods and we're gonna start off with Artemis because god I love her.
AMANDA: god, I love her too. I can't wait for this episode knowing so much more about Artemis. And this is going to be a little mini-series that we sprinkle throughout the next several months. So, basically, all of the next, just Julia and Amanda talking about a myth episode, are going to be cycling through our remaining Olympians. And gosh, I can't wait.
JULIA: I'm really, really excited. And you know who else I'm very excited to join us on this new journey, Amanda?
AMANDA: Is it Rachel, our newest patron?
JULIA: It is.
AMANDA: Rachel, welcome. You would join the ranks of our many lovely, beautiful, attractive patrons including our supporting-producer level patrons: Uhleeseeuh, Allison, Bryan, Debra, Hannah, Jack Marie, Jane, Jessica Stewart, Justin, Keegan, Kneazlekins, Megan Linger, Megan Moon, Phil Fresh, Captain Jonathan MAL-uh-kye Cosmos, Sarah, Scott, and Zazi. And the legend-level patrons who are basically our Olympians when you think about it: Audra, Clara, Drew, Jaybaybay, Ki, Lexus, Mary, Morgan, Morgan H., Mother of Vikings, Sarah, & Bea Me Up Scotty. There aren't 13 of them but, like, just, just pretend we're close.
JULIA: I will. I will, you know, it's enough for me and that's all that matters.
AMANDA: Absolutely. And Julia, over the last week what have you been reading, watching or listening to that you think our beautiful attractive conspirators would like as well?
JULIA: So, this is not a reading, listening to, or watching lately thing, but I am getting spooky-season started Amanda.
AMANDA: Yes.
JULIA: And so, this past weekend, I visited one of the newest, like, scary monster things on Long Island, The Long Island Monster Gallery, which is-
AMANDA: What?
JULIA: -very very cool. It is a, a family friend has finally put his dream business into fruition and has opened this incredible basically like, monster museum, with like incredible sculptures. Like Madame Tussaud's level sculptures of, like, every single classic monster you can think of. Plus some like more classic 70s and 80s and 90s horror characters. And even like The Sanderson Sisters from Hocus Pocus. It's very, very-
AMANDA: What?
JULIA: -fun and very, very cool. And if you're looking for something to do during these two spooky months, definitely check it out if you're on Long Island
AMANDA: I have some problems with, like, Christmas creep, you know? Christmas, like, creeping up earlier in the year, but spooky-season, I think, can start basically once Labor Day is done.
JULIA: Yeah, yeah. September 1st, honestly.
AMANDA: Like sundown on Labor Day. Yeah, honestly.
JULIA: When Starbucks puts out pumpkin-flavored things, that's when spooky season starts.
AMANDA: I completely agree. I am so amazed and I can't believe that this is a thing in our own hometown. So, congratulations and I'm so glad you enjoyed it.
JULIA: Yeah, it was a blast. Definitely check it out. It's going to be a lot of fun.
AMANDA: Incredible. And also, if you are out of Multitude content and or our Spirits content and you're like, "Oh, god. I listened to all episodes of Spirits twice. I've texted my friends. I've become a patron. I've brought merch. What more is there for me to do?" A great way to support us, support the show and find new wonderful podcasts that you know are going to be welcoming and inclusive and explain to you why you should love the things that we love. Check out shows from Multitude like Horse, a podcast all about the stories, drama, and like, interpersonal intensity of basketball, which is kind of like, you know, it's mythical when you think about it.
JULIA: Yeah, the basketball players are really the, like, modern folkloric heroes of our time.
AMANDA: So true. It's hosted by Adam Mamawala and Mike Schubert, and they talk to guests. They do fun segments, and they give you, like, unbelievable fun anecdotes from the history and culture of basketball. New episodes are out every other Monday. So, just search for Horse in your podcast app or go to horsehoops.com.
JULIA: If you want a reason to listen to it, if you're listening to Spirits, and you're like, "Hey, I don't think I would be really interested in basketball. One of the first episodes they do, they talk about how one of the basketball teams hired a witch to curse the other team during the playoffs. This is the quality content you want from Horse.
AMANDA: Yes, there are so many episodes for you to enjoy, that's horsehoops.com or search for Horse in your podcast app. So, without further ado, everybody please enjoy the first installment of It's All Greek To Me: Artemis.
JULIA: So, Amanda, it's been a minute since I feel like I've broken out my Edith Hamilton's mythology, but now seems to be the perfect time because 1) I am finally playing Hades because it recently became available on PlayStation. Man, that's a good game.
AMANDA: Oh, hell yeah. It is.
JULIA: I've, I have defeated my dad three times now. I'm very proud of myself.
AMANDA: Congratulations.
JULIA: Thank you. Thank you. And I wanted to celebrate the launch of our good friend Mike Schubert's newest podcast, The Newest Olympian.
AMANDA: Hooray.
JULIA: Where he's going to be reading the Percy Jackson series by Rick Riordan. So, hell yeah Mike. Yeah, more Greek Mythology for Mike, please.
AMANDA: Love it, and you can find that by searching The Newest Olympian or the word Multitude on your podcast player.
JULIA: And that'll pop up all of the Multitude shows including us, including Join the Party, including Exolore, all the stuff.
AMANDA: All the stuff.
JULIA: So obviously, I have been thinking a lot about Greek mythology, just because of all of these things kind of coinciding all at once. And so, I wanted to take a little trip back to our roots and talk about one of the Greek goddesses that I remember absolutely loving as a kid. Like, she was my girl. I put out a tweet earlier on in the year where I was like, I realized now the reason I like silver over gold jewelry is because I just aligned myself with Artemis over Apollo in a very young age and now everything has to be silver.
AMANDA: And Julia, when I read tweets like that, I just sort of nod knowingly. Much like when I see a meme about being like a Scorpio moon or something. I'm just like, "Aha, okay. Yeah, that sounds right." So, much like a Zodiac episode, I'm always happy to add more to my card catalog of, like, like a grandma whose kid works in podcasting. And I'm like, "Okay, I'm going to just write down a few little details about what that means, and the next time, I'll be less confused." And so every time we get to talk about one of the major figures of, of Greek mythology, I'm always like, "Okay, phew. Yes. Now I know what that means slightly more.
JULIA: Yes. So we're going to be discussing Artemis this episode. Artemis is genuinely one of my favorites as a kid. Like, Persephone edged her out just a little bit because I was an edgy little kid. So, I'm actually really excited to revisit Artemis through the lens of the show, the lens of Spirits because if there's anything we love doing and learned to do in this show, it's that the Greek gods are fallible and they have some fucked up aspects about themselves.
AMANDA: Indeed they do.
JULIA: So 2) Sometimes, it's better to take off those rose-tinted glasses and be like, "What? Why was this your choice young Julia? Why, why her? Why this?"
AMANDA: Let's do it.
JULIA: But at the same time, like, that's the point of Spirits, right? Like, we love things complexly, even for all their faults, and we're able to be critical of them while we re-examine it. So yeah, let's get started talking about my girl, Artemis.
AMANDA: Fabulous.
JULIA: So, as we've talked about on the show, at least in passing, Artemis is the twin sister of the god Apollo and the daughter of Zeus and Leto. Leto herself was the daughter of the Titans, Coeus, and Phoebe, but there's not a lot else that's really known about Leto, like before the story that I'm about to tell you. Mostly because her stories are about like, her pregnancy and the birth of Artemis and Apollo, and then she does some stuff after but mostly that's like, the start of her story.
AMANDA: Classic history.
JULIA: Classic history. You start when you become a mother. Classic. So, when Hera found out that Leto was pregnant with Zeus' children, she told the land that Leto could not give birth on "Terra firma". So, it means she couldn't give birth on any island in the sea, not on the mainland of Greece, nor any place under the sun.
AMANDA: Wow.
JULIA: So, Leto was kind of forced to search for a place that basically didn't exist, that you know, didn't fall into the category of any of these things. All while in labor. So, that sucks, not a good time.
AMANDA: Good goddamn.
JULIA: Listen, people who are pregnant and become, like, parents can be very powerful. I know there's always that, like, story about a parent who was able to, like, flip a truck off a child.
AMANDA: Yeah.
JULIA: Because they just got that adrenaline running and everything like that. And you know, your body releases all those weird endorphins and stuff when they're in pain, but I can't imagine that this was a fun adventure for her.
AMANDA: No, no, I can't. Like, it is, it is heroic and herculean enough if, if I may get Greek on us here, to birth a child. You just need to do all this planning for yourself.
JULIA: Well, luckily for her Poseidon kind of saw her plight and so, brought a small island out of the sea so that she could give birth on it. So, she clung to an olive tree that kind of sprung out of this island when it came out of the water and she gave birth to Apollo and Artemis after four days of labor.
AMANDA: From a tree?
JULIA: While clinging to a tree, like to, because the island I think was kind of floating around until the, the kids were born.
AMANDA: Oh, god. Wow.
JULIA: It's a lot. Interestingly, the story goes that Artemis was born first and being a goddess. And we know from Greek mythology that like, the gods and goddesses, even after, like, being infants are able to do things that adults can do.
AMANDA: Tiny baby man Jesus, but gods.
JULIA: Yes, basically that. So, Artemis was born first, and being a goddess, she was able to help her mother as a midwife to finish giving birth to her brother.
AMANDA: Hmm.
JULIA: So, she kind of assisted her mom in giving birth to her own twin, which is kind of cool.
AMANDA: Classic oldest child. Am I right?
JULIA: This is why you don't tell twins who's the oldest.
AMANDA: My parents have never to my knowledge told-
JULIA: I know.
AMANDA: -my twin siblings who are oldest.
JULIA: And that's why I know that you never tell which sibling is the oldest if they're twins.
AMANDA: They'd, they'd be too powerful.
JULIA: I know you know in secret, but-
AMANDA: Of course I do. Of course, I do.
JULIA: -you would never tell. Of course, you do. You know what's up. So, as such the island where the twins were born would become known as Delos and the mountain out of which the Olive Tree grew was called Mount Cynthus. So, Artemis is sometimes referred to as Cynthia according to Edith Hamilton.
AMANDA: Really?
JULIA: Which I guess I had forgotten that but like, if that's the origin of the name, Cynthia, I really like the name Cynthia now.
AMANDA: Yeah.
JULIA: Like, what a good name.
AMANDA: Damn.
JULIA: Yeah. She is also known as Phoebe and Selene, though these are just like aspects of former goddesses that were later synchronized onto her. So, Phoebe, like I mentioned before, was the Titan's, Mother of Leto. And her name means shining while Selene was the personification of the moon. And both of these aspects are associated with Artemis. However, because she was identified with the moon, similar to how Apollo was associated with the sun. They became later entwined into the same goddess or at least were associated with each other. Later, poets would refer to Artemis as a goddess with three forms, or as we refer to it on the show, the triple goddess. In this iteration, Selene was the aspect of, like, the sky. Artemis was the earth. And then Hecate was the lower world, like the underworld, but also the dark skies beyond the actual sky. So, like space, and now I can't get over the fact that Hecate is the goddess of Space. That's so cool.
AMANDA: I mean, listen, I, I will never get over the injustice that Hecate's whole situation and Macbeth was cut for time from our high school Macbeth theatre production. And ever since then, I've just, I've had a real, you know, fondness with her. This just makes it even stronger.
JULIA: Yeah, no, I wish we hadn't cut that. And maybe I could have played Hecate, that would have been fun. That would have been fun for me.
AMANDA: It's so good.
JULIA: But then I wouldn't have been able to do all the, the edible blood stuff that I was doing backstage.
AMANDA: So fun. So good.
JULIA: So I could have, and then because Hecate's in like one scene of Macbeth, right? That's it.
AMANDA: Yeah, no. She, she's in and out.
JULIA: Yeah. So, I could have been, like, in costume while sticking blood packets in people's mouths. It would have been a blast.
AMANDA: Incredible.
JULIA: So, Artemis is not just about the moon. She's also "The Lady of Wild Things. Huntsman and Chief to the gods," which Edith Hamilton calls, "An odd office for a woman," but he was also writing this in 1947. So, I'm not going to hold this too much against her.
AMANDA: Yeah, you gotta, you gotta hold both things in your head at the same time.
JULIA: Side note, Edith Hamilton, most likely a lesbian. She never married and she lived with her companion, Doris Fielding Reid, and they raised Reid's nephew together and like homeschooled him and stuff.
AMANDA: Gasp.
JULIA: And they were buried in the same cemetery. So.
AMANDA: Oh, fuck yeah, dude. Edith and Doris together forever.
JULIA: Yeah. Just giving a little context for Edith Hamilton as we go through her notes on Artemis, you know, just so you can kind of look at it and be like, Hmm, Edith. Okay.
AMANDA: She was the original mythology queer.
JULIA: She was. She was. So, often Artemis was said to be the Protector of Youth in particular. Like, mostly because she was associated with, like, midwifery because of her role in her brother's birth, but also hunters are good about protecting the young in the forest.
AMANDA: Sure.
JULIA: In that, like, you're never gonna, like, kill a baby deer because.
AMANDA: Yeah, it's a steward that flock.
JULIA: Exactly. Exactly. She's, she's the Steward of the Youth. So, that's something. The poet's would call her "The Protectress of Dewy Youth" which I really like.
AMANDA: Okay, that, that to me edges on kinda, not sure how I feel about that word, but.
JULIA: Yeah.
AMANDA: I'm with you.
JULIA: Dewy, which is just like such flax and cheeks and whatnot.
AMANDA: I don't know. There's a bit of a kind of like, like all the language people use around budding. Particularly, around people assigned female at birth and puberty. I'm just kind of like, I don't want anything to do with it, and the word Dewy for me. It's, it's on notice. It's, it's on the edge.
JULIA: It's like a, it's like a leaf in the new dawn. Yeah.
AMANDA: Yeah. Yeah.
JULIA: However, because Edith Hamilton loves pointing out the conflict within gods, she notes shortly after that, that Artemis was the one who called for the sacrifice of a Iphigenia, who was the maiden Daughter of Agamemnon, in order to allow the Greek fleet to sail to Troy and restore the winds to them so that they could do that.
AMANDA: I remember from our other weird Iphigenia and Alice, high school theatre production. Why? Why?
JULIA: We did that in also arrestees, and I was like, "What is happening? These are such odd choices."
AMANDA: They were odd, at least I got to wear a toga. It was comfy.
JULIA: That's fair. That's fair. Artemis only did this. It's not like she was like, "You guys have to sacrifice a young woman to me. Just for no reason." It was because Agamemnon had killed a sacred deer in her sacred grove, and then boasted that he was a better hunter than Artemis herself, which is like come on, dude.
AMANDA: Come on.
JULIA: Have you learned nothing from all the other stories?
AMANDA: Clearly not.
JULIA: In other versions of this story that I've seen at least. However, before Agamemnon is able to deliver the killing blow, Artemis flies in, she snatches Iphigenia off of the altar, and instead replaces her with a deer. So, the story say that after she spirited Iphigenia away, the girl became one of Artemis' priestesses, or was granted immortality by Artemis and became her hunting companion. I'm going to tell you a little bit more about that story later because it has an interesting outcome, but this is another instance of Artemis being, like, fierce and vengeful, but also she's known to show mercy in killing humans. So, it was said that if a woman was to die a swift and painless death, it was because she was killed by Artemis' Silver Arrows.
AMANDA: Wow.
JULIA: She had mercy but also she was vengeful, which is probably why young Julia liked her quite a bit.
AMANDA: You're like, "Yes, principles."
JULIA: Yes, principles. Artemis is also notable because she is included in the Maiden goddesses of Olympus, including Hestia and Athena. Here's a great quote from Edith Hamilton, which includes, "Golden Aphrodite, who stirs with love. All creation cannot bend or ensnare these three hearts. The pure maiden Hestia, grey-eyed Athena, who cares but for war and the arts of the craftsman, Artemis, lover of woods and the wild chase over the mountains."
AMANDA: Damn.
JULIA: I love and I super appreciate the way that is stylized because oftentimes, Artemis and, and the rest of the maiden goddesses, the main focus is on like their capital V, Virginity. And this verse kind of suggests that it's all about like, love rather than sex. And I kind of love the reading of asexual Artemis, personally.
AMANDA: Totally.
JULIA: Additionally, like going away from that reading for a second and giving us a little bit of, like, Greek cultural context, part of Artemis being a virgin or abstaining from sex in most stories is because the ancient Greek cultural context of virginity being a prerequisite for marriage, which is problematic in it of itself. That's fine. To not be a virgin though means that you have, like, you're married now and that you're therefore subservient to your husband. And so, Artemis being a "Virgin" means that she is subservient to no man.
AMANDA: So, unfettered rather than virginal.
JULIA: Yes, yes. Just not tied down by any man. Off to run the woods if she so pleases.
AMANDA: We can get by on that.
JULIA: Yeah, of course. In another instance of that kind of, like, two sides of every Greek god situation, Artemis, like I said before, very closely associated with childbirth and is the goddess that is evoked when someone is giving birth. This most likely, like I said, was tied into the fact that she was born and then immediately helped her mother birth her brother. So, even if she's not being like the mother figure herself, she is there, like, kind of holding the hand of women who choose to enter into motherhood and are giving birth.
AMANDA: Which is awesome, and as I get older stories between women, one of whom has kids and one of whom doesn't, it, like, strikes really close to home. Like, it's not a situation that I'm in in my life yet, but hearing people be like, "Yeah. Like, I don't have kids, but my best friend has a 10 year old", then they're fucking rad and I love hanging out with them. Like, it just, it brings a little tear to my eye.
JULIA: That is very true and very, very sweet. Also, it goes without saying, Artemis is probably not only just being, like, cool with women who are giving birth, honestly. Anyone who is giving birth, Artemis was there, holding your hand, making sure everything goes smoothly.
AMANDA: Hey, you've, you have to do this. You deserve anything you need.
JULIA: Yeah, of course. Artemis' childhood is not particularly touched upon in the myths of the Greeks, though there is a poet named Callimachus, who tells a couple of, like, cute vignettes from her childhood. One of which is her sitting on the lap of her father, Zeus. Like, sitting on his knee on his throne in Olympus and telling him 10 wishes that she hopes that he will grant her. Would you like to hear the wishes of baby Artemis?
AMANDA: Yes, I would.
JULIA: Number one, to always remain a virgin. Fine, whatever.
AMANDA: Aka, I don't want a husband. Okay. Yes, good.
JULIA: It's great, and she didn't have the words for that quite yet.
AMANDA: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
JULIA: Especially because like, Zeus is off marrying his children to random people all the time. Like, don't do that.
AMANDA: No thank you.
JULIA: Number two, to have many names to set her apart from her brother Apollo. Number three, to have a bow and arrow made by the cyclopses.
AMANDA: Yeah.
JULIA: Number four, to be Phaesporia or the Light Bearer, which I don't know exactly what that means. I do know that, like, you know, she is associated with the moon and the, the crossing of the moon across the earth on her chariot and whatnot. So, that's, that's probably something to do with that. Number five, to have a short knee-length tunic so that she can hunt.
AMANDA: Yeah.
JULIA: Number six, to have 60 Daughters of Oceanus, all nine years old to be her choir. So, basically a choir of like, young ocean nymphs.
AMANDA: Damn, what a good use of a wish.
JULIA: Number seven, to have 20 river nymphs as handmaidens to watch her hunting dogs and bow while she rested.
AMANDA: Incredible.
JULIA: Number eight, to run all of the mountains.
AMANDA: Yep.
JULIA: Nine, to be assigned to any city and only to visit when called by birthing mothers.
AMANDA: Aw.
JULIA: And number 10, to have the ability to help women in the pains of childbirth.
AMANDA: Aw, damn. Really closing out in a selfless way.
JULIA: Yes, yes. It's very, very good. Very sweet. And then also like, it's like, "I want a cool outfit and a bunch of people to like help me hunt."
AMANDA: I love that.
JULIA: Callimachus then goes on to describe how she gains her bows and arrows from the cyclops, as well as tales about how she visited Pan, who gifted her, her infamous hunting hound, and how she managed to capture six golden horned deer to pull her chariot.
AMANDA: incredible. Just like making the most of the station of your birth, you know?
JULIA: Yeah, no. It's, it's very good, very sweet. I love her so much. So, knowing a little bit of background about Artemis, why don't we dive into some of the stories that most heavily feature.
AMANDA: Please.
JULIA: Well, we'll do that, Amanda, but first, we got to grab a refill.
AMANDA: All right. All right, let's go. We are sponsored this week by Calm, and they are doing something that I think is so valuable. Basically, in this ad break, they're asking us to ask you to take a little break. Unclench your jaw, relax your shoulders down a little bit, take a deep breath, sit up. Doesn't that feel better?
JULIA: It does. It really does.
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JULIA: Sleep more, stress less, live better with Calm. Now, Amanda, it is the perfect time of year, temperature-wise for me. I went on a hike the other day and I saw so many mushrooms and it was beautiful out, and I was comfortable in my, like, summer transitioning into fall wear. And one of the most important features of that summer transitioning into fall wear is a comfortable bra. It is so important. It is life changing and it is from Third Love. And Third Love obsesses over every stitch so you never have to think about how something looks, feels or even wears. So, trends come and go but Third Love has always stayed true to the single notion that they do comfort for you. And the Third Love shopping experience, also extremely calming and not troubling at all. You just take their fitting room quiz which takes, like, a couple of minutes, that's it. And it gets you the perfect size and style for your bra. And you can compare your Third Love bra to that older bra that doesn't fit very well and you'll see the difference. It is so comfortable. And not only do they do bras, they also do sleep-wear. They do lounge styles. I have a pair of lounge pants that I am absolutely in love with. Definitely check their stuff out and Third Love knows that you deserve to feel comfortable and confident 24/7. So, right now they are offering our listeners 20% off your first order. Go to thirdlove.com/spirits now to find your perfect fitting bra and get 20% off your first purchase. That's thirdlove.com/spirits for 20% off today.
AMANDA: And finally, we are sponsored by one of our oldest and one of our most beloved sponsors, Shaker & Spoon. This is a monthly subscription of cocktail box that teaches you to make great drinks. Basically, they send you all the things you need, garnishes, syrups, you know, fun little spices you get to grate or put in your drink. And all you have to do is supply one bottle of booze, and their box makes three different custom cocktails, four of each kind. So, that's 12 drinks in total and teaches you new skills that you're going to put to use going forward. It's also a great gift. They make it so easy, Julia, to give different gifts. All you have to do is give them your giftee’s email address, and they send them an email telling them the good news. The giftee puts in their shipping info, make sure, like, which of the boxes they want to order. If you're not positive, what kind of liquor somebody likes to drink, and then, like, you're the hero because you get to just be like, "Oh yes. You're welcome for this month-long extravaganza you get to enjoy from Shaker & Spoon. So, whether you want to have some Passover, or spice up your cocktail routine, learn some new skills or send the best gift ever. Maybe send a gift and get the same box and then, like, remotely, you guys can have, like, a little cocktail hour on zoom, that sounds awesome. Shaker & Spoon is the spot for you.
JULIA: I legit did that with my parents for Christmas last year and it was the best experience. It was so much fun. We did three months of it together and we would, like, send each other pictures of when we are trying the different cocktails. I also really loved that they have a store. So, if you liked a cocktail a lot from, like, a previous box and you're like, "Oh, but I don't have any more of the, like, apple spice tincture that they sent me." You can just buy that kit again and get it sent to you and you just buy the bottle again and it's great. I love it so much. Shaker & Spoon quality, quality products.
AMANDA: It is so good. I bought my sister a bunch of barware from them. Like, Shaker & Spoon is amazing. They are so lovely. They like, had cocktails at her office warming party. They're a local business here in Brooklyn, and we just could not love them anymore. And if you want to try out their incredible product and support Shaker & Spoon, go to shakerandspoon.com/creepy. Where the code creepy will get you $20 off your first box. And don't share this code guys. The Internet wants it. They can't have it. Only you can have it, that's a shakerandspoon.com/creepy. Use the code creepy for $20 off your first box and then tag us in your photos. They're so beautiful.
JULIA: Thanks Shaker & Spoon. We love your cocktails.
AMANDA: We love you Shaker & Spoon, and now let's get back to the show.
JULIA: So, to honor the goddess Artemis and her Silver Arrows, I have created a Silver Arrow Martini, which is kind of a twist on a silver tequila martini. Just with a little bit more fruit juice to kind of add a little bite that I feel like Artemis would appreciate if she was enjoying a couple of cocktails with us. And with those in hand, Amanda let's soak these in and get back to our stories about Artemis.
AMANDA: I wore all my silver jewelry to match the drink and our protagonist here.
JULIA: Wonderful, wonderful. I wish I had, like, a silver martini glass that I could serve these in. That'd be so good. So, the first story I want to tell you involves a sacred spring and a woman named Arethusa. So, Arethusa was once a young huntress and a follower of Artemis, and she loved the freedom that came with hunting and that the forest brought her. And much like Artemis, was not interested in marrying or the advances of men. One day, Arethusa is coming off from a hunt and she comes across this beautiful crystal clear river in which she can bathe. And you know, coming off of a hunt, you're hot, you sweaty, you just want to relax. You've been walking a lot, probably, I imagine. So, she gets undressed. She slips into the water. She starts enjoying her bath, but she feels as though she's, like, being watched and so very quickly, leaps from the stream like a frightened deer.
AMANDA: Damn, yeah.
JULIA: So, she hears a man's voice call out to her asking like, "Where are you going?" And "Why are you going so quickly?" But she flees into the woods.
AMANDA: None of your business street harasser.
JULIA: Yes. And so, she very quickly realizes that she's being pursued, but the voice chasing after her is just like, as fast if not faster than her. And so, calls out to her like, "Oh, I'm Alpheus. I am the god of the River that you were just swimming in and I've fallen in love with you because you've bathed in my waters," which does that happen every time that someone comes and bathes into the river ro do it? Like, how many ladies have you pulled this line with?
AMANDA: Seems unsustainable.
JULIA: Yeah, but Arethusa wants nothing to do with him and continues to flee. But when it becomes clear that Alpheus is most likely going to outrun her, she calls out to Artemis who in that moment changes her into a spring, and then cuts the earth creating a tunnel between Greece and Sicily.
AMANDA: Whoa.
JULIA: So, Arethusa plunges into the hole and emerges in Delos. Again, that's the island that Artemis was born on, and that is where her spring now bubbles as a sacred spring of Artemis to this day.
AMANDA: That's a pretty badass origin story.
JULIA: Yeah. However, it is also said that Alpheus continued to follow Arethusa through the tunnel in the shape of his river or at least attempted to do that. And that's why it is said that if you were to toss a wooden cup into the river of Alpheus in Greece, it would reappear in the well all the way in Sicily.
AMANDA: Incredible.
JULIA: Isn't that so cool? I love that so much.
AMANDA: That's so cool.
JULIA: In some versions of this story, it is Artemis that Alpheus falls in love with, not Arethusa. And when she goes to visit his waters, she immediately kind of suspects his motives are to kidnap her and so she covers her face with mud so that he can't recognize her. Like a real predator moment here.
AMANDA: Yeah, or I mean it will travel to the forest, right?
JULIA: Yeah, yeah. I mean, Artemis doesn't care how she looks, you know? She's gonna roll around in the mud to make sure some guy doesn't try to kidnap her. There's a lot of attempted kidnaps of her in, in his stories that I'm going to tell and no one manages it because she's too smart.
AMANDA: That's incredible.
JULIA: Yeah. Similar to our previous story, Alpheus is not the only man to make the mistake of crossing Artemis in or near a body of water. A Greek mythology is kind of sometimes like that meme where it's like, "If I had a nickel for every time Artemis got pissed about a man in a pool of water, I'd have two nickels, which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it has happened twice, right? It was said that the Royal Son of the house of thieves, Actaeon was a great Hunter, but his house was just, like, plagued with tragedy. This was the same house that Oedipus would eventually be born into and it had been started by the hero Cadmus, who we talked about in our Westworld episode because he was the one that sowed the dragon's teeth into the ground to create his people, but Actaeon would meet a sad fate much like the rest of his family. One day he was out hunting and he came across a grotto where a crystalline river emptied into just, like, a perfect little pool. Like, sometimes nature's just perfect in that way, you know?
AMANDA: Now I'm nervous.
JULIA: So, when Actaeon saw it, he immediately wanted to cool himself in the waters but as soon as he stepped into the grotto, that was the same moment that Artemis had entered and dropped her gown to bathe as well.
AMANDA: Oh, damn it.
JULIA: So, Artemis, spotting a mortal immediately just like, you know, staring at her naked bod, and not wanting to find out if he had peaked on her on purpose or by accident. She immediately transforms him into a stag by kind of splashing him with the water from her hand. Like, you know when you're washing your hands and someone is standing next to you, you just flick the water in their face?
AMANDA: Yeah.
JULIA: That's what she did. And then he turned into a deer.
AMANDA: I mean, unfair, but also what a mood.
JULIA: His body as well as his mind, become that of a deer and so he flees in horror only for his own dogs to chase him down and bring him down and killing him.
AMANDA: Oh, damn. I mean, I can't believe I'm saying this on Spirits, but that man didn't do anything wrong.
JULIA: Yeah, he didn't really do anything wrong, but Artemis like, wasn't gonna check to find out because what if the guy escaped or something like that. That wouldn't be good. But she also like she takes it very seriously that no man holds any power over her, you know?
AMANDA: Yeah.
JULIA: Not this guy. He's not going to have weird leverage or blackmail over her. She's a goddamn goddess.
AMANDA: If you're going to be a goddess, choices are gonna have to be made. So I, I get it.
JULIA: Yes. There is also a story that highlights not only Artemis, but one of my favorite lady heroes in Greek mythology, Atalanta.
AMANDA: Oh.
JULIA: I love Atalanta. So, Atalanta was an only child of a man who desperately wanted a son. So, he left her in the wilderness because he didn't want to raise her.
AMANDA: Not how you do it.
JULIA: Not how you do it, bud. Give the baby to someone else. Anyway, a she-bear immediately took care of her. Though, some of the stories claimed that it was Artemis who was the one that sent the bear to save Atalanta in the first place. And then eventually, she was found by hunters who brought her home and raised her as their own.
AMANDA: Hang on. Just, just changing my Twitter bio to she-bear.
JULIA: Yeah, wonderful. Love it. Love that journey for you.
AMANDA: Okay, good to go.
JULIA: Okay, great. So, she was raised to be one of the greatest hunters in the land, and her fame only grew when she took place in the hunt for the Calydonian boar, which was a boar who had been sent to the country of Calydon by Artemis as a punishment for the King there because he had forgotten to honor her when sacrificing the first fruits to the gods at harvest time. Just like come on, dude.
AMANDA: Can't forget Artemis.
JULIA: There's only 12 of them. It's not that hard.
AMANDA: Memorize and make a little mnemonic for yourself. Make a little song.
JULIA: It should be easy. So, this boar that Artemis sent devastating the land, killing cattle, and men alike. And so, the King calls for heroes to come and slay the beast and Atalanta was among them. To make a long story short, she was the first to pierce the skin of the boar with an arrow even though the Son of the King was the one who delivered the killing blow by stabbing it.
AMANDA: Uh-oh.
JULIA: However, the Prince insisted that the honors of the hunt go to Atalanta and that she be given the boar's skin, which is good.
AMANDA: Surprising.
JULIA: He did the right thing. It was also because he had fallen in love with her but still, did the right thing.
AMANDA: Oh, sure, sure, sure.
JULIA: However, that Prince would meet an untimely death and because he honored Atalanta and the hunt with his actions, Artemis turned his grieving sisters into guinea fowl, which Artemis favored. I am pretty sure this is supposed to be a good thing and not a bad thing.
AMANDA: Like you. You're a bird now.
JULIA: I turned your sisters into birds, but this is a good thing because they, like, couldn't stop crying and they were overburdened by their grief. The birds were then brought to one of her shrines and cared for until the end of their days. So, everything was fine.
AMANDA: I mean, that is, that is beautiful in a way. I'm sure, I'm sure there are times, you know, in a life where you're like that would be pretty nice to be pampered like that.
JULIA: Yeah, they're, they're good birds. They're good birds, Prince. So, not a lot of Artemis in the story of Atalanta necessarily, but I bet she, like, guided the arrow that Atalanta had shot from her bow to ensure that she got the first blood from the beast. Or she didn't, I bet she at least respected the hustle and the skill. So.
AMANDA: I picture Artemis like on a, on a fainting couch, and then any time someone respects a woman, she's like, "Fucking finally."
JULIA: Yes, send blessings to you. You'll get a good boar today.
AMANDA: Yep.
JULIA: Here is another story with a little bit more of revenge from Artemis, because why not? Sure.
AMANDA: Yes, please.
JULIA: This story focuses on two children of Poseidon named Otus and Ephialtes. They were both giants even from a young age and extremely ambitious, which is never good in Greek mythology.
AMANDA: No.
JULIA: So, they both set out to prove that they were actually greater than the gods themselves and started by imprisoning Ares by binding him in brass chains and shutting him away in a cage. You know, Ares god of War. Not, not great.
AMANDA: Yeah, not great.
JULIA: The problem is, Ares, not the most popular among the gods. Mostly because he was both bloodthirsty and also a coward. So, the rest of the gods were kind of somewhat reluctant to help him out. They're like, "I guess, I guess we can, we can help him." And so eventually, they send Hermes who is able to steal Ares away in the middle of the night, but the brothers' momentary victory kind of only pushes them to act further. So, Otus informs his brother that he's in love with Hera and plans to carry her away while Ephialtes swore that he was in love with Artemis. So, they decided to draw lots to see who they're going to attempt to kidnap first. And the one in love with Artemis, obviously won the game of chance. And so, they set out into the wilderness and the forest to try and find the goddess. How do you think this is gonna go out? Amanda? Anything. Give me the play by play.
AMANDA: Bad, bad, Julia. I think they'll get turned to like fucking worms or something and then Artemis will turn into a hawk and then eat them both.
JULIA: Ooh, that would be very good. I would be into that. Not how it ends, but not too far.
AMANDA: I'm just gonna say, just, just keep the idea of it. Just, just keep it in mind. Put it on the backburner. Keep it back in your mind. Just, just work with it.
JULIA: I'll write a new version of the story if you want.
AMANDA: Thank you. Thank you.
JULIA: So, Artemis knows that they're coming. They're not being, like, on the sly about it really. So, they find her running towards the sea and pursue her but this is all part of Artemis' plan. So, she knows that all of Poseidon's sons have the ability to run on water like they do on land because that's a cool fucking move. So, she flies over the water as they chase her to the island of Naxos, when they finally catch up with her, Artemis disappears. And so, they're, like, very confused. They're looking around, and immediately they spot a new beauty to pursue, and it's a beautiful milk white doe.
AMANDA: Wow.
JULIA: Yeah, so they forget all about Artemis in that moment and instead start chasing the deer, but they quickly lose sight of it in the dense forest of the island. So, they decide to separate to cover more ground and set off. Always split the party, as we know. Always it's the good thing to do. So, later as they're hunting at the same moment, they managed to find the doe in an open field, and they're so focused on their task in like, bringing down their, their prey that neither of them sees the other brother on the other side of the field, also attempting to kill the doe. So, they throw their javelins at the same time and just in that moment, the doe vanishes and the weapons fly past their intended target and strike the opposite brother instead.
AMANDA: That's tough and a tragedy.
JULIA: Yeah.
AMANDA: However, I am now thinking about a police procedural set in ancient Greece, where it's like a bunch of impossible crimes and you show up in the field and you're like, "How did these two brothers hit themselves at the same time in the same moment with their, with two different javelins?" It's like a locked room mystery where the answer is like an ice cube, like the wet puddle, there was an ice cube there but instead it's like, "It was the gods wasn't, wasn't it?"
JULIA: Artemis is just sipping wine in the corner. "Who can say?" The brothers each slayed and were slain by their siblings, and Artemis gets her revenge. As she does. As she does. There's only one story where Artemis doesn't get her revenge and we'll talk about that last.
AMANDA: I still think it would be, it would be pretty sick to turn them both into worms and eat them and then poop and then leave.
JULIA: That would be nice. Maybe next time. So, you remember how I told you the, the short version earlier of The Tale of Iphigenia?
AMANDA: Yeah.
JULIA: And that there was a, there was a sequel to it kind of. So, there is another version of the story that is sort of that sequel about what happens to Iphigenia after she is taken from the altar. In this version of the story, Iphigenia was brought to the City of Brauron by Artemis after she whisked her away from that sacrificial altar and she is told that she must build a temple to Artemis there in Brauron. So, it was said that Iphigenia, like, when she died at that temple because she was going to, you know, commit the rest of her life to Artemis who saved her. She was told by the goddess, "They will dedicate the finely woven material of woven cloth which by chance women having lost their lives in childbirth abandon in their homes. I command you to set forth these Greek women from the ground due to their correct intentions."
AMANDA: Wow.
JULIA: Yeah. So, I love that. She has like given her tasks, she's ready to go. So, while Iphigenia is like, still alive and living and working in this temple that she created for Artemis. There is said that these two Athenian men came to the woods near Brauron and killed a sacred bear of Artemis'. Stop killing sacred animals of Artemis', you know?
AMANDA: Yeah, just don't.
JULIA: Half of her stories are like, "You killed something that I love, and now I must kill you." It just keeps happening. So, in response, the goddess, "Sent a plague that would cease only if the Athenians would consecrate their daughters to her, the bear Artemis every five years. So, here's a fun fact that I just learned when I was doing the research for this and I am super in love with. There's a festival of Artemis in Brauron that has girls ages 5 to 10, which is considered the "Period of ritual wildness before puberty."
AMANDA: Whoa.
JULIA: This is very good.
AMANDA: Someone go back and tell child Julia about that.
JULIA: These girls would be dressed in saffron robes which were similar to the ones that Iphigenia was said to wear when her father went to sacrifice her.
AMANDA: Sick.
JULIA: And they quote, "Acted as bears in order to appease the goddess." And much like the goddess, they kind of wore those shorter knee-length tunics as well. And they would wear bear masks during the rituals.
AMANDA: That sounds so fucking fun.
JULIA: If I have a child, and it happens to be a girl from ages 5 to 10. We are going to celebrate this goddamn holiday.
AMANDA: Every year.
JULIA: Every year this festival. Every year. Oh, man. It's so good. I love it so much. And then, the final story is probably the most well-known story about Artemis and I, I wanted to finish off the stories of Artemis for that exact reason with it. You'll probably recognize the name Orion because I feel like it's one of the most identifiable constellations in the sky, like, anyone can really look at the sky and be like, "There's Orion."
AMANDA: Mmh-hmm.
JULIA: But let me tell you about who he was, how he became a constellation, and what Artemis has to do with all that.
AMANDA: Yes, please.
JULIA: There's actually a couple of stories or at least a couple of different versions of the story that end differently, and Artemis factors into several of them. But it was said that Orion was a young man who was gigantic in size and beautiful in appearance. Love that journey for him.
AMANDA: We love a himbo.
JULIA: Most importantly, to our stories, though, he was a fantastic hunter, as you can imagine. He first came across Artemis after a whole situation where he was in love with this woman and wanting to marry her, but her father who was a King thought that Orion had insulted her while drunk and so invokes Dionysus to come and punish Orion. So, Dionysus puts Orion into a deep sleep like a drunken stupor, basically. And the King blinds him, can't really hunt when you're blind. However, Orion goes through an Oracle. Oracle tells him that if he went as far east as he could, and let the rising sun's light fall on his eyes, he would get his sight back, which he obviously goes and he does,
AMANDA: Okay.
JULIA: Getting his sight back, he wants to go and hunt down this King for what he did, but the King and his daughter have gone into hiding and fled, and he's not able to track them down. He tries hunting them down by going to Crete, but that is where he finds Artemis and her mother Leto hunting. And so, he decides to join their hunting party and Artemis becomes, like, very fond of him as he was obviously a wonderful Hunter, and she's very impressed by his skill. And even, like, objectively even if she's not, like, sexually attracted to him, she's like, "You've got a pretty face, man." You know, sometimes you just do.
AMANDA: Sometimes you want to hang out with pretty people.
JULIA: Almost all of the gods are pretty so, you know, you're just surrounding yourself with pretty people. Now, this is where things start to differ, but the ending is kind of always the same, and it's that Orion dies.
AMANDA: Happens.
JULIA: So, the first tale says that Orion, while on a hunt with Artemis, boasted that he could kill every beast on earth and would do so just for Artemis, right?
AMANDA: See Julia, this is toxic masculinity.
JULIA: Yeah.
AMANDA: You don't have to kill every animal in the world for you, girl. You can just say, "Hey, girl. I respect you. Can I be emotionally vulnerable with you and can I listen to you and support you in your desires?"
JULIA: Yeah, he's just trying to prove himself but it ends up backfiring on him because he's heard by Gaia, the goddess of the Earth, who objects to such a brag and sees it for what it might have been a threat.
AMANDA: Sure.
JULIA: In this story, Gaia sends a giant Scorpion to kill Orion and Orion falls to the beast. After his death, Artemis asks Zeus to place Orion in the sky as a constellation in order to honor his memory, which Zeus agrees to. He even adds the image of the Scorpion that killed him, which is how the constellation of Scorpio came to be as well to kind of honor their epic battle, and that's why they're right next to each other in the sky. In another tale, it was said that Eos, who was the goddess of the Dawn, had fallen in love with Orion. And it was said that Aphrodite had cursed Eos when she had slept with Aphrodite's lover, Ares. So, she made her, like, mad with love. And so she, like, spends a lot of time in Greek mythology like, kidnapping and abducting men that she's fallen in love with who might not necessarily love her, but in this version, Eos kidnaps and/or abducts Orion to take as her lover and Artemis follows them and kills Orion. Though most of the stories that I came across don't give a reason as to why Artemis kills Orion. Like, my best assumption is maybe it was payback for Eos for stealing away one of her best hunters or perhaps she thought Orion had betrayed her and left willingly with Eos. I can't really say for sure, but here's a quote from the Odyssey that kind of gives a little bit of context from it and it's also beautiful. So, "So it was when Eos of the rosy fingers chose out Orion. You gods who live in such ease yourselves were jealous of her until chased Artemis in her cloth of gold, visited him with her gentle shaves, and slew him in Ortygia,” which is another name for Delos.
AMANDA: Gorgeous.
JULIA: It's beautiful, but describing something horrible.
AMANDA: I think that's much of the Odyssey.
JULIA: Classic Greek mythology. Classic Odyssey. However, the final version of this story is my favorite and perhaps the saddest. It is clear in this story that Orion is in love with and just completely devoted to Artemis. And Artemis' brother Apollo, kind of becomes jealous of their relationship. So, he does that terrible god thing and he decides to plot you know? He's going to come up with a plan to separate the two. So one day, he knows that Orion is swimming far off in the ocean away from the shore, like, I guess working out or something like that, you know? And so, Apollo invites Artemis to go on a walk and suggests that Artemis couldn't possibly hit the shadowy object in the water miles and miles away. Couldn't possibly hit it. Couldn't do it. So, Artemis feeling challenged and there's probably some sibling rivalry occurring here either takes a rock which she skips along the surface of the water or takes an arrow and fires it at the object in the sea. Either way, she hits her mark and kills Orion, and it wasn't until Orion's body washed ashore that she realized what she had done and she just starts weeping over his body. It's really bad. This is like the most emotional she has ever gotten for an emotion that isn't rage.
AMANDA: That blows.
JULIA: At that point, she goes to Zeus and like before, she asks that Orion be placed among the stars, which Zeus honors and Orion is still there to this day.
AMANDA: That one is sad.
JULIA: I know it's sad, but it's also, like, kind of lovely because we see Artemis have real emotions that aren't just, "I'm mad at this man," or "I'm protecting this woman."
AMANDA: That's true. I hope as we improve upon the work that came before and don't just uncritically look back on them and say, "That's the tops," that we can say like, "Hey, more, more moments like this." Artemis, she gets to have some plotlines that don't involve someone she cares about being killed, but this is a very, very good way to view, I think, what is ultimately a bit of a sad story.
JULIA: Yeah. So, those are some of the more interesting stories of Artemis in my humble opinion. I'm the one that collected them. So, it's my favorites, personally. And as you can tell, much like many of the Greek gods, she's just like a complex character full of her own faults and is prone to a lot of revenge-focused stories. Like, that's just who she is and it is like a thing with the Greeks. They are constantly getting revenge on people or giving come-ups and to people who claim that they are better than them. And so, she's not unique in that sense, like, there are plenty of stories of Hera doing this, of Athena doing this. Even like, even level-headed Athena doing stuff like this. Zeus is constantly getting revenge on people as well. So, it's not just Artemis is a harpy of a woman not to get all Greek but I think that she is someone who is, like, full of her own faults, but also has a lot of redeeming qualities. Like, she is a protector, but those are like, you know, her day-to-day rather than these like instances of, like, revenge that stick out in the stories, you know? She's out there every day, you know, helping people give birth and you know, helping them through the process and stuff like that or protecting young, young deer and whatnot from, from getting slaughtered by hunters like goddamn Bambi.
AMANDA: We love you, Artemis.
JULIA: Yeah. Nonetheless, I really appreciate her role among the Olympians, and I think that she's worth learning something about, so if you want to do a little bit more reading on Artemis. Again, I love Edith Hamilton's mythology. There are a bunch of different options. There's plenty of Greek translations and Greek stories that you can read about her.
AMANDA: You know, Julia. I think that Edith Hamilton should really move over because Julia Schifini's guide to Greek mythology is my favorite.
JULIA: Oh no. Oh no, don't put that on me. I am just standing on the shoulders of giants, and by giants I mean the sweet lesbian old lady.
AMANDA: Well everybody, be careful bathing naked in streams and remember.
JULIA: Stay creepy.
AMANDA: Stay cool. Spirits was created by Amanda McLoughlin, Julia Schifini, and Eric Schneider with music by Kevin MacLeod and visual design by Alison Wakeman.
JULIA: Keep up with all things creepy and cool by following us @spiritspodcast on Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and Tumblr. We also have all of our episode transcripts, guest appearances, and merch on our website. As well as a forum to send us in your urban legends, and your advice from folklore questions at spiritspodcast.com.
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JULIA: Thanks for listening to Spirits. We'll see you next week.
AMANDA: Bye.