Episode 27: 30 Myths in 30 Minutes (ANNIVERSARY BONANZA)
/A whole year has come and gone, and we’ve told a lot of stories. So why not DOUBLE IT? To celebrate Spirits Podcast’s first birthday, we’re giving you 30 myths in as many minutes - we hit almost every continent (fuck you, Antarctica), tell stories of warrior goddesses, magma monsters, creepy bears, and why Wario definitely isn’t a Maori deity.
And hey, we want to take a minute to thank you all. We made it a year because of you, our amazing listeners. So, stay creepy & stay cool.
Want to give us an anniversary gift? Take our audience survey! spiritspodcast.com/survey
Myths discussed: Clytie (Greece), Chinnamasta (Hinduism), Huitaca (Colombia), Pazuzu (Babylon), Ammit (Egypt), San Pascualito (Guatemala and Mexico), Kuebiko (Japan), Kumugwe (Native American), Whiro (Maori, New Zealand), Olokun (West Africa), Varuna (Hinduism), Winalagalis (Canada), Polyphemus (Greece), Tammuz (Sumeria), Deer Woman (Native American), Bake-kujira (Japan), Bugbear (UK), Cheval Gauvin (France and Switzerland), Drop Bear (Australian), Grootslang (South African), Al-mi’raj (Arabia), The Zaratan (multiple), Salmon of Knowledge (Ireland), Cherufe or Mapuche (Chilean), Leshy (Russia), Shellycoat (Scotland), Domovoi (Russia), Preta (India and China), Myling or Utburd (Scandinavia), Wolpertinger (Germany).
Want our second year to be even better than our first? Help us grow by spreading the word! Follow us on Twitter, Facebook, YouTube, & Goodreads, and review us oniTunes to help new listeners find the show. Plus, check out our Patreon for bonus audio content, director’s commentary, custom recipe cards, and more. We can also be reached at spiritspodcast@gmail.com.
Our music is "Danger Storm" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com). Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0.
Transcript
AM: Welcome to Spirits: a boozy dive into myths and legends, where we, two history nerds, get tipsy and discuss mythology, legends, and folklore from around the world.
JS: I, Julia, bring the expertise, while Amanda here brings, well, enthusiasm.
AM: Yeah. I get to learn along with you, the listener, in every episode as Julia regals us with her tales. And, you know, I just make a lot of Harry Potter references.
JS: So, this week, guys, it is our one year anniversary. So, we want --
AM: One year.
JS: We want to do something really, really fun and exciting for you guys. So, we did 30 myths in 30 minutes
AM: Oh, my god, Julia, that's like – that's like one class period in high school. I'm learning way more than the like AP World History curriculum in a whole year.
JS: Fuck AP World History.
AM: We had so much fun recording this, and we hope that you guys enjoy it as well.
JS: There are so many stories that I love guys that we just either don't have time to tell you or there's not enough information out there for me to tell you about. So, we tried to condense this rapid fire tour of every myth that I wish we could do a full episode on, which we probably will do a full episode on a couple of these because I stopped during research. I'm like, "Damn, we should do this."
AM: Yeah. We're like clearing the docket. And I think it's a pretty great way to start our second year. And, by the way, all of the names and countries of origin for these myths are in the description. So, you can google them later. You're going to want to.
JS: Because we had so much fun doing this episode. So, let us know on Twitter and Facebook if you want to know more about any of them. I'm happy to walk you through it on Facebook or through email or whatever you want to do.
AM: Julia is like your pocket historian. Here for the questions whenever you have them.
JS: That's true.
AM: And you know what else I love, Jules? I love our supporting producer-level patrons: LeeAnn Davis, Shannon Alford, Phil Fresh, and Brandon Grugle. Thank you guys for your support.
JS: Brandon Grugle, you snuck in on under the wire there. Good job.
AM: Snuck in under the wire like two hours before recording. Excellent. And we also want to thank the 36 other patrons, our knights in shining armor sustaining us through our first year.
JS: Our beautiful dragon-destroying wonders.
AM: Starfish?
JS: Starfish. No. That doesn’t work.
AM: Not so good an image [1:58]. But we are grateful for every single one of you. Your presence is a present. But, if you, dear listener, want to give us a little gift for our anniversary, our new audience survey is the way to do that. It takes five minutes. It’ll help us find sponsors for the show, keep this train rolling. It’s spiritspodcast.com/survey.
JS: Please do it. We want to get sponsors. We want more money to buy more drinks. And, and to tell you better myths.
AM: And to make this weekly potentially.
JS: Yes.
AM: And the way that we can do that is by getting some sponsors for the show and really like helping us sustain this going forward. So, again, that’s spiritspodcast.com/survey.
JS: It’s gonna take five minutes. And we will be able to give you so much more creepy, cool material to – just for you to love.
AM: And our website is pretty banging. So, just check out spiritspodcast.com.
JS: Amanda did a new website, and it’s so beautiful.
AM: It’s just – basically, it shows Allyson’s artwork so perfectly. So, thank you, Allyson, while we’re making thanks for one year anniversary, for the logo of a lifetime.
JS: And thanks to Eric for working his audiomancer magic on each and every episode.
AM: Thanks to our fellow podcasters, accepting us with open arms and including us in this amazing audio community.
JS: And thank you for our parents for no longer enforcing swear jars.
AM: Here's to another year, and, with that folks, enjoy Spirits Podcast Episode 27: 30 Myths in 30 Minutes.
JS: The anniversary bonanza!
Intro Music
AM: So, Julia, over the past year, we have taught people over 26 separate myths. This is Episode 27. And, so, in the last year, we have done some roundups, and some episodes had multiple things and multiple traditions. But we taught people like 30-ish minutes from around the world.
JS: Yeah.
AM: Pretty cool.
JS: That is pretty cool.
AM: So, today, we're going to double that corpus.
JS: Yep.
AM: And we're – we're gonna bring you --
JS: Fuck it. We're gonna break our record.
AM: -- 30 myths in one episode.
JS: It's going to be nuts.
AM: Why? Frankly, because we like pain and challenging ourselves.
JS: We like pain and just some of these myths don't require full episode. So, we might as well just get them out of the way.
AM: Exactly. Bits and bobs.
JS: There's some awesome stories. It's great.
AM: Great stuff. We can make more jokes with you on Twitter. We can get more fan art of these lovely myths that we love. Ah, it's gonna be great.
JS: It is really gonna be good.
AM: Are you ready for this? I mean I hope it's gonna be good.
JS: It's – I mean, it is gonna be good.
AM: I've had a lot of cold medicine. I'm not gonna lie to you right now.
JS: Okay. Let's fucking do this right now.
AM: Okay. Kids, don't – don't mix narcotics and drinking.
JS: Don't do that.
AM: I'm not drinking. I'm just – I'm just sick. Okay.
JS: She's so sick.
AM: I'm so sick.
JS: All right. Are you ready?
AM: I'm ready.
JS: Starting off in Greece because, of course, it's Greece. We're going with --
AM: It's where it all began. Incest is fine. That's my lesson.
JS: Yes. Always good. We're going with the story of Clytie. She's an ocean nymph. She's totally in love with Helios, which is the Titan and personification of the sun.
AM: That I know from being a speaker of English.
JS: But Helios is in love with another woman. He's hardened his heart against Clytie. So, to kind of make sure that he falls in love with her again because she is desperate for his love, she stripped down naked and lays in a field where she can watch the sun rise and set unobstructed.
AM: Sounds like a great way to get skin cancer.
JS: She lies there for nine days. Does not eat or drink anything.
AM: Oh, shit.
JS: She dies. Helios feels a little bit bad. So, he turns her into a flower known as the heliotrope, which is like beautiful, and purple, and really thorny.
AM: It is a beautiful flower. I thought you were gonna say she turned into fruit leather, which is probably what happened to her after nine days in the sun.
JS: I mean probably. Let's be real. She probably would be more like a dry fish, because she's an ocean nymph.
AM: God, Julia, that was too specific.
JS: I'm sorry. Okay. Moving on, Chinnamasta, Hindu goddess of self-sacrifice and sexual restraint.
AM: Oh boy.
JS: Uhuh. She cut off her own head and enjoys parading around with it, while three spurts of blood flow out of her open neck. Yep. And then these three spurts are then drunk by her severed head and two of her attendants.
AM: Why sexual restraint and self-sacrifice?
JS: So, it's interesting because some demons mixed up this immortality elixir.
AM: Okay.
JS: And, so, she drank the elixir. And then, in order to make sure they didn't get it, cut off her own head.
AM: Oh.
JS: Yeah.
AM: That is very interesting.
JS: I don't know why sexual restraint. But that's why that's regular restraint.
AM: That's why my brain was like I just don't see those two things going together. Maybe It's – I don't know.
JS: Maybe [Inaudible 5:50].
AM: Taking a backseat to other people. Whatever. Okay. It doesn't matter.
JS: All right. Moving on. Huitaca, she's the goddess of a native tribe in Colombia. She's the goddess of dance, arts, witchcraft, sexual liberation, and the moon.
AM: That's basically my Twitter bio.
JS: I know.
AM: So --
JS: Absolutely. She was extremely beautiful. She lived a life full of joy, pleasure, and drunkenness.
AM: Whoa.
JS: But she was punished by her father for rebelling against his wishes. And he turned her into an owl. Moving on.
AM: Oh.
JS: That's it.
AM: Okay.
JS: That's it.
AM: All right. I'm sorry, girl.
JS: Pazuzu, he is the king of the demons of the wind in Babylonian legend. He is the bearer of storms, and drought, and locusts, and shit, and just --
AM: All the bad stuff.
JS: -- all the bad stuff. And you may have heard his name before because he was the evil spirit that supposedly possessed a girl in the movie, The Exorcist.
AM: I haven't seen that movie, but it does sound like a sneeze when you say it. Pazuzu.
JS: Pazuzu. However, he is known to do some good stuff because he fights off this goddess, Lamashtu. That sounds right.
AM: We're gonna roll with it.
JS: Who is the goddess who will harm mother and child during childbirth. So, he does one good thing.
AM: No one wants that goddess around. No one wants that around.
JS: He does one good thing on the sides.
AM: You gotta get some good air. He’s [Inaudible 7:01] side breath in the natural air. Like, Pazuzu, that way.
JS: Pazuzu, good. Yes.
AM: Or, like, actually, sneeze saves a mother's life. Great.
JS: Sounds good. Next one up, Ammit, who is the devour and soul eater in Ancient Egyptian mythology.
AM: Okay.
JS: She is a female demon, who has the body of a lion --
AM: Whoa! Plot twist.
JS: -- and a hippo, and a head of a crocodile. She is the devour of the hearts of the dead when they're weighed.
AM: Right.
JS: So, if the heart weighs more than a ostrich’s feather, she devours their heart.
AM: So, wait. All of them?
JS: Well, no. So, your heart is supposed to weigh only as much as like, the evil deeds that you did in your lifetime.
AM: Right.
JS: We'll talk about that when we do in Ancient Egypt. Moving on.
AM: Oh, okay. Okay.
JS: The people who have their hearts devoured cannot continue on their voyage to Osiris in the afterlife and immortality.
AM: Right.
JS: The dead then die a second time with their hearts being devoured.
AM: Wow. That's rough.
JS: All right. So, San Pascualito, he is the folk saint and King of the Graveyard in Guatemala and parts of Mexico.
AM: Awesome.
JS: He is venerated as a saint. He's associated with curing diseases but is represented as a skeleton wearing a cape and a crown.
AM: Whoa.
JS: A friar dying of an epidemic fever saw a tall skeleton in glowing robes when he was in his like fever haze.
AM: Right.
JS: He appeared to him in a vision. The man was told he would die within nine days, but the epidemic would end. When that fryer did, he became --
AM: Martyred saint.
JS: San Pascualito.
AM: That's awesome. Like he, he burned through his mortal body, but he's here to help you save yours.
JS: Yeah. And, now, he's got glowing robes and is a giant skeleton.
AM: I --
JS: Like he's out in graveyards. It's awesome.
AM: I dig it. I did the aesthetic. Not gonna appropriate it, but I dig it.
JS: Kuebiko, the god of knowledge and agriculture in Japan, which is – this is adorable. He is represented as a scarecrow, who cannot walk, but is aware and conscious.
AM: That's sounds.
JS: It's basically the Wizard of Oz.
AM: That sounds less adorable than like a waking nightmare where like you're trapped in your body and paralyzed and only your eyes can move.
JS: He's basically the scarecrow from the Wizard of Oz though. It's adorable.
AM: Whatever you say, Jules.
JS: Okay. So, it’s said that he's the god of knowledge because, since he stands outside all day, he sees and knows everything that happens in the world.
AM: Like a doorman.
JS: Yes.
AM: If you're interested in good stories in New York City, go talk to some doorman.
JS: The doorman is the patron god of knowledge in New York City.
AM: I mean he is though.
JS: I mean that is true.
AM: You need like a single cigarette at 3:00 in the morning, ask the doorman.
JS: Kumugwe, the god of the undersea world for the natives of the Pacific Northwest. He has a house under the sea that is full of riches. And his name means the wealthy one. He's the master of seals. And his house is made up of living sea lions.
AM: That, that checks out. And it's like --
JS: Yeah. I'm into it.
AM: Yeah. Like sea lion bodies. Like nothing is better at keeping, you know, water and cold out. So --
JS: It's probably a very loud house too.
AM: Yes. Probably, probably lots of – lots of barking for fish.
JS: So, he can also see into the future, heal the sick, and he enjoys eating the eyes of people who displeased him like apples.
AM: I hear that eyes are pretty good if you're an under sea god. It’s a nice delicacy.
JS: He also has rounded fish eyes, rows of gills, and suction cups like octopus.
AM: Oh, my god. This sounds so dope and also makes so much sense that he is a kind of like wealthy, you know, god or spirit figure as well.
JS: Yeah.
AM: Because, you know, that like, like the seal fur and seal body and all those parts like that – that is like such a multifaceted resource.
JS: Yeah.`
AM: And it makes sense that he controls them.
JS: Also, I'm thinking like crash ships, sunken treasure – that sort of thing.
AM: Exactly.
JS: It makes sense, right?
AM: Yeah. Yeah.
JS: Okay. Whiro, the Maori Lord of Darkness, he is the embodiment of all evil.
AM: Hold on. I'm just checking in with you. Not Oreo.
JS: No, not Oreo.
AM: Whiro.
JS: Whiro.
AM: Whiro?
JS: I mean it's W - H - I - R - O. Whiro.
AM: Whiros?
JS: No. We're not gonna do the whole thing. Okay.
AM: Yeah.
JS: So, embodiment of all evil. He lives in the underworld. He's responsible for the ill of every person. Well --
AM: Hold on. I'm checking again. Is Wario like their uncle? Is he like the oldest cousin?
JS: No. Wario is the evil like twin Mario. Like like evil --
AM: They're twins?
JS: They're not twins, but, you know, it's like the--
AM: I know he's the like dramatic foil, Julia.
JS: Yeah.
AM: I'm not asking about the literary archetype here.
JS: I don't --
AM: Fucking no.
JS: Okay. Moving on.
AM: Okay.
JS: He devours --
AM: Hold on. I forgot already. Who is he?
JS: Whiro, lord of darkness, embodiment of evil.
AM: Of?
JS: When people die – of Maori culture.
AM: Okay. Great. Back.
JS: When people die, their bodies go to the underworld. They're devoured by Whiro. He – if he devours enough bodies, the legend says he will grow stronger. And he will eventually break free of the underworld and devour everything on the surface.
AM: Well, that sounds bad because the toll of dead people is only rising.
JS: Well, interestingly, the reason behind the Maori cremating bodies is because Whiro can't get strength through ashes.
AM: Interesting.
JS: There you go.
AM: I like it.
JS: It's a good explanation of a funeral myth.
AM: I like it. But why is – why is the evil warrior wearing yellow?
JS: No. Yellow isn’t nice really? God.
AM: Continue on.
JS: Olokun is the androgynous Orisha, which is worshipped in African mythology and in Santeria. They give their worshipper great wealth, health, and prosperity. They're also, interestingly, the patron Orisha of the descendants of slaves brought over from Africa.
AM: Wow.
JS: It's really interesting, right? And you wouldn't think they would have a patron, Orisha. But I'm super into that.
AM: Yeah. Especially as a group of people who need, you know, guidance, wealth, prosperity, you know, an extra hand from fate more than anybody else.
JS: Yeah. I want to talk about that more, but we're moving on.
AM: Okay.
JS: The Varuna is the Hindu god of water and the celestial ocean, and is also the god of the law of the underwater world.
AM: Celestial ocean?
JS: Yes.
AM: Is that like a – like part of the spirituality and system of gods?
JS: I assume so.
AM: Okay. We haven't gotten to Hinduism yet. Not yet.
JS: No. He rides a crocodile like mount called Makara. He is also the god of termites, scorpions, and eels. And he is said to be the god that you pray to if you wish to be protected from thunder and lightning.
AM: Interesting.
JS: Like got full coverage on that one.
AM: I know he like marshals the infestations that you don't want. Like you don't want eels in your leg. You don't want termites in your home. And I guess, if you want to control the thunder and the lightning, you know, he can bring it.
JS: He's totally bringing it. He's bringing the thunder.
AM: Oh, no.
JS: Winalagalis, the war god of a native tribe of British Columbia. He travels the world in a magic war canoe making, you know, war.
AM: That sounds like a much better movie than the 15th movie about Chris Hemsworth.
JS: I agree. He gives magical powers to red cedar bark for some reason. That's all right.
AM: I mean I think it's like a – like an importance of the tree.
JS: Yeah. They use it I'm sure.
AM: Yeah.
JS: He's described as thin, tall, black, and has huge eyes like a bat.
AM: Cool.
JS: And he is announced by whistles when he arrives from the north, which, in this mythology, the North is the underworld.
AM: Wow.
JS: Which I guess make sense. It's like desolate and cold out there.
AM: Barren. Right.
JS: I'm into that.
AM: Yeah. Northern winds. You know, serious stuff.
JS: Polyphemus. You might know Polyphemus as the cyclops mentioned in the Odyssey.
AM: Okay, I do.
JS: He is the son of Poseidon. He has one eye. He's giant. And, interestingly, he is one of the first notable stories of a character being a shepherd and a cheesemaker, which I'm so into.
AM: Yehey. Cheesemakers.
JS: In the Odyssey, Polyphemus keeps sheep. And, when Odysseus and his men discover the giant's cave, he's storing milk and aging cheese there. Not the point of the story. I just think it's super awesome.
AM: Wow. I love that. That like agricultural production beyond just like raising animals and farming is --
JS: Yeah. Isn't that exciting?
AM: -- is present there.
JS: It's so cool.
AM: I love that. Why don't – why is the cyclops giant? Sign up.
JS: Because he's born of Titan I think maybe. It's like he's got a --
AM: Oh, okay.
JS: -- Titan mother and Poseidon's his dad. Something like that.
AM: Interesting.
JS: Yeah. Okay. Tammuz, the Sumerian god of food and vegetation. But the interesting part is that his worship has a lot to do with the funeral service that his followers throw him every year.
AM: Hmm.
JS: So, basically, at the beginning of the summer solstice, his followers begin a period of ritual mourning marking the shorter days and the extremely hot days and drought with a six-day funeral for Tammuz --
AM: Wow.
JS: -- who can only live six months out of the year before dying and then being revived again six months later.
AM: Definitely [Inaudible 15:10] of Persephone obviously.
JS: Yes.
AM: But like that makes a lot of sense. Because, at the – at the height of summer, aren't we all thinking like, "Oh, man, the best is over."
JS: Hot and miserable.
AM: It's hot. It's gonna be, you know – but like, also, in the future, like the weather is never going to get better. Yeah. That makes sense.
JS: Yeah, it does. Now, we're going to transition more into like spirits, creatures, and monsters.
AM: And we're halfway, right?
JS: We're halfway through it.
AM: All right.
JS: We, we can do this. We can do this.
AM: Rally. Okay.
JS: Rally. Okay. The Deer Woman, she is a spirit that is actually featured in many Native American traditions. She's normally shown as either a woman, deer, or a mix of both. She is associated with fertility and love and is usually described as a benign spirit. However, her claim to fame is that she lures promiscuous men to their deaths. Yes.
AM: My very important question though is --
JS: Yes.
AM: -- when she is half deer, half woman, does she have inexplicable boobs like the Russian bird ladies?
JS: No. Actually, a lot of times, they'll do deer top, lady bottom.
AM: Ughhh.
JS: Yeah, even creepier.
AM: Oh, no.
JS: Not any less.
AM: I wish I didn't ask that question.
JS: An appearance of the deer woman can be a message of a need for personal transformation.
AM: Yeah, dude.
JS: Or, it’s a warning for misfortune on the way.
AM: Wow.
JS: I want to talk so much about her. We're going to do a full on this.
AM: We gotta. We gotta.
JS: Okay. Moving on. The Bake-kujira is a Japanese creature that's name literally translates to ghost whale. So close to ghost shark. I can't even deal with it. So, it is a large ghostly skeleton whale that is usually accompanied by strange birds or fish, but they didn't specify why these birds and fish are strange.
AM: Oh, my god.
JS: In the story, a fisherman tries to harpoon the ghost whale, but the harpoon goes right through it because it's a ghost whale. And the whale just floats away. In most stories, it is said to bring a curse or a misfortune on the area in which it is spotted.
AM: Oh,my god, I have so many thoughts.
JS: Go.
AM: Number one, it's the like natural conclusion of Moby Dick --
JS: Yes.
AM: -- where like, even, even when the actual white whale is not there to hunt, the, the specter of the white whale, which it was all along. Spoiler alert. Not actually that it's the ship. But no, no. But, but like – like the, the white whale is a metaphor, and the ghost white whale is a metaphor of the metaphor. We're getting double deep Inception level Leonardo DiCaprio metaphors here, Julia.
JS: Your English brain is just like spasming right now.
AM: I'm spinning. I'm spinning. I'm, I'm pulling myself out of my cold to get really enthusiastic about this right now.
JS: I'm so proud of you.
AM: But, also, what if the ghost whale is like a luminescent thing from the deep, right?
JS: I love it.
AM: Like these strange fish, strange birds. Like what if they're the like glowy angler fish like --
JS: Yes. Yes.
AM: -- dangly thing on the forehead. You know, iridescent albino things from the deep
JS: I want to see this drawing.
AM: I know.
JS: Someone draw this for us.
AM: I know. I know you're out there guys. Draw it.
JS: Bugbear.
AM: Bugbear.
JS: Bugbear, a creature British mythology.
AM: Is that D&D?
JS: Yes it is.
AM: Ugh.
JS: It is a boogeyman used to scare disobedient children into behaving. It was originally depicted as a creepy bear that hangs out at the edge of the woods waiting to scare children who wander too far from home.
AM: How do bears get creepier?
JS: It's just – it's a creepy, creepy bear. But, in some --
AM: It's a bear that like --
JS: It's the [Inaudible 18:03] bear.
AM: -- hangs around the high school after graduating.
JS: Oh, god.
AM: Oh, no.
JS: He sells pot to teenagers.
AM: I know he has cigarettes for his two young girlfriends in his like shitty car.
JS: Okay, Listen.
AM: Okay. Okay. Tell me about it. Tell me about it.
JS: In some stories though, the bugbear is considered a good thing, because the bugbear is chasing the children back home where they'll be safe from creatures that are more malicious than the bugbear.
AM: Bugbears is mom's enforcer.
JS: Good job. [Inaudible18:27].
AM: Good job protecting.
JS: Cheval Gauvin is a legendary evil horse from Southern France and the Jura Mountains of Switzerland.
AM: Whoa.
JS: It can be found along rivers, in forests, and, creepily, in cemeteries.
AM: Okay.
JS: Much like our pal, the Kelpie, it would kill those who mounted it by drowning them or by throwing them into chasms or ravines.
AM: Not a particular taste for children here.
JS: Not great. No, not a particular taste for children. Just like whoever happens to stumble upon it.
AM: And I like that. Like, "Bro, no, why me?"
JS: Like I like this one.
AM: That's what I'm here for.
JS: No. So, it is the harbinger of death, similar to the grim, and is used as a boogeyman for children – oh, there you go. It's used as a boogeyman for children in the areas of the Alps that the story is told in.
AM: I'm getting the sense that peasant families with, you know, more kids and then they have time to mind mostly are just like the thing in the forest will get you. Don't let the Cheval get you.
JS: Don't touch the --
AM: Don't.
JS: -- weird horse.
AM: Don't go away.
JS: Goddamn it, Hongs. Don't touch the weird horse. Dropbear.
AM: Dropbear.
JS: Dropbear.
AM: Not dropbox. Not bugbear.
JS: It is – no.
AM: But dropbear.
JS: Dropbear. It is a contemporary Australian folklore. The dropbear is almost the exact same thing as a koala bear, except it is carnivorous and predatory. I know. I know. I can't deal with it. So, they're larger than your average koala. And they hunt by inhabiting tree tops, and then dropping on their unsuspecting victims.
AM: Oh, my god.
JS: It's usually just – it's basically a hoax that's used to frighten tourists or to get them to act ridiculously while they're in the outback. Like someone's like --
AM: Like wear dumb hats.
JS: -- if you pee yourself, dropbear would attack you. Like dumb shit like that. If you put Vegemite on your like – in the back of your ears, the dropbear won't attack you.
AM: I love that. I love that like any koala at any time could actually be a dropbear.
JS: So fucking dumb. All right. Grootslang.
AM: Okay. Wow. These names are just getting --
JS: They're just getting really good.
AM: They're just getting – either my DayQuil is kicking in or I'm getting – I'm getting confused.
JS: South African giant snake supposedly as old as the world itself.
AM: Whoa.
JS: When the gods were still new at creating creatures --
AM: Yeah.
JS: -- they made a mistake.
AM: Oh, no.
JS: So, they created this giant, giant serpent that was violent. Had too much strength, cunning, and intelligence. They realized they fucked up. So, they tried to split it up – to split up all the grootslangs into different animals, and it became --
AM: There’s more than one?
JS: Yes. It became snakes and elephants.
AM: Whoa.
JS: One escaped.
AM: Oh, no.
JS: It bore a bunch of children. And, now, grootslangs live in caves full of diamonds and devour elephants whole.
AM: Okay. Number one, I love that the gods made a mistake.
JS: Yeah.
AM: Like I think it's just really instructive and great.
JS: Yes.
AM: Like we all fuck up sometimes. We try to fix it, but, sometimes, it will be bad. Number two, lots of aboriginal Australians have a kind of like snake creation myth --
JS: Yes, the rainbow snake.
AM: -- that I think is like so – yeah. That's like so dope. And I love the idea of a snake as kind of one of the like, you know, primordial creatures. And, three, it sounds a lot like Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them.
JS: Yes, it does. Moving on.
AM: Okay. Where do you find them? The diamond caves. That's where you find them.
JS: Yes. Al-mi’raj, this is a creature from the Middle East that basically looks like a rabbit with a black unicorn horn.
AM: Oh, nope. Don't want that.
JS: It's about two feet long, and is shockingly deadly. They're --
AM: I feel like that would be your Patronus --
JS: Yes.
AM: -- if your Patronus is a deadly magical creature.
JS: 100%. It's ferociously territorial. It will stab animals and people to death with its horn if they intrude on its land.
AM: Is it poisonous or just stabby?
JS: No, just stabby.
AM: Wow. That's worse.
JS: It also has an immense appetite. And it will devour any creature much larger than it very easily.
AM: Nope.
JS: The only way to get rid of them is to be charmed by a true witch. And they can remove the thing and put it somewhere else.
AM: I love that it's on witches’ side. My opinion has reversed. Go, go rabbit horn thing.
JS: Cool. Zaratan. So, the Zaratan is actually found in a couple of different mythologies. It is a giant sea turtle with an extremely long life, and it is impossibly huge. It's actually so big that,oftentimes, its shell is mistaken for a small island.
AM: Yeah.
JS: The stories of these giant sea creatures are really common in the age of exploration and the expansion of seafaring across the seas. And, you know --
AM: They're finding islands all over the joint.
JS: Yeah. They were just like, "Oh, this one just disappeared the next day probably because the tides rose." But they were like, "No, it's a giant turtle that’s just swimming away."
AM: Or, Dennis had too much moonshine last night. Thanks, Dennis.
JS: Yeah. Fuck Dennis.
AM: And like saw an island. Oh, that's not there anymore. Sorry, cartographer, it was a turtle.
JS: Going to your home roots, Amanda, we're going to hear a ridiculous one from Ireland.
AM: Bring it.
JS: It's called the salmon of knowledge.
AM: Oh, no.
JS: So, this is a salmon, an Irish folklore that was once an ordinary salmon. But then it ate --
AM: Weren't we all, Julia? Weren't we all once ordinary salmon?
JS: But then, Amanda, it ate nine hazelnuts that fell into the well of wisdom.
AM: Okay.
JS: By doing this, the salmon, therefore, learned all of the world's knowledge.
AM: Okay.
JS: By eating the salmon, a person can, in turn, gain all the knowledge as well.
AM: Right.
JS: Apparently, some Irish poet spent seven years fishing for this thing.
AM: Ah, typical.
JS: Yeah.
AM: Okay. Love that Irish myths are always so impoverished.
JS: Yikes.
AM: It's not – this is not the gold bars. This is not Rumpelstiltskin. It's – someone had --
JS: It was a salmon.
AM: -- like nine hazelnuts. More than one hazelnut at a time. They're like, "Well, it was really important." But what are the physics of this thing like? Is there just one salmon? Like it could be any of the salmons --
JS: There is one salmon.
AM: -- in the river?
JS: There's one salmon. It has no distinguishing features. It's just a salmon.
AM: It's like the salmon is like the Limitless pill. And, all of a sudden, my grandfather wants to eat Bradley Cooper.
JS: Listen, this --
AM: That's what this myth is essentially.
JS: The salmon eats Bradley Cooper.
AM: Only he doesn't get a makeover and like starts wearing nice ties, and like has a haircut.
JS: Exactly. I didn't watch that movie, but that sounds right.
AM: I have a – I have a shameful place in my heart for it. I find it really entertaining.
JS: Cherufe --
AM: Okay.
JS: -- is a Mapuche or Chilean creature that is made up of magma and lava.
AM: Dope.
JS: It inhabits magma pools in the volcanic mountains of Chile.
AM: Tierra del Fuego .
JS: And it is the source of eruptions and earthquakes. Now, how do you stop those eruptions and earthquakes, Amanda? Well, the Cherufe, you know, has a hunger for human flesh.
AM: Yeah.
JS: In particular, it has a taste for virgin maidens.
AM: Naturally.
JS: So, that means they had to toss virgin maidens into the volcanoes so they wouldn't erupt. Later, in cryptozoological tellings, the Cherufe is a large reptilian humanoid creature.
AM: Obvi.
JS: Obvi.
AM: Like that orange one from XMen.
JS: What? What?
AM: The orange one? Or Fantastic Four?
JS: The Thing?
AM: Yeah.
JS: Okay. Yeah, I guess.
AM: Is that its name?
JS: Yeah.
AM: That's an unimaginative name.
JS: Yeah. I mean his name is Ben, but his code name is The Thing.
AM: I, I love picturing these gods with really specific sacrificial demands as like rock stars with a really specific rider. Like they need a – they need a bowl of like --
JS: Avocados.
AM: -- M&Ms with all the yellow ones picked out --
JS: Ugh.
AM: -- and like avocados picked from the tree of knowledge and like macerated at noon on a sunny Solstice. It's like --
JS: Only blonde maidens with, you know, perfectly blue eyes.
AM: My PAs can only be, you know, short-haired, red-headed women over six feet.
JS: All right. So, Leshy. The Leshy is a Russian forest spirit that can change their shape and size, but, usually, they're humanoid. In stories, he will lead travelers astray in the woods or basically just steal children that go too far into the woods. When not transformed, they have long hair and beards that are made up of vines and other plant life, which helped them naturally camouflage.
AM: No. No.
JS: Obvi. They are sometimes considered guardians of particular forests. And one way that he's known to kill travelers is by tickling them to death.
AM: Oh, no.
JS: Seriously.
AM: With his vine beard?
JS: Yeah, with his vine beard.
AM: Oh, man.
JS: Like, like that creepy dude like, when you're making out with someone, and they have like a little bit of like facial hair, and it's like tickling you. And you said – told him to stop, but they keep doing it anyway.
AM: I thought you are making a specific dig at me. And I was like, "Julia, I have not made out with any creepy dudes." Like --
JS: No, of course not, Amanda. The Shellycoat.
AM: Let's move on.
JS: The Scottish boogeyman who haunts rivers and streams. The name comes from the fact that they wear a coat of shells, which --
AM: I could have guessed. I could have guessed.
JS: Yeah, no shit. Good job, Scotland.
AM: Listen, it's cold. They don't have time for extra syllables. It's fine.
JS: So, the coat of shells rattles when they move, which kind of sounds like bells and shit.
AM: Yeah.
JS: They're relatively harmless compared to let's say our boy, the kelpie. And they mostly just mislead wanderers traveling through their territory or else pretend to be like someone who's drowning and then laugh at people when they stopped to help.
AM: Wow.
JS: Yeah.
AM: Sounds like a specific guy in one town who had like been mythologized sufficiently to have a, you know, cool nickname and lore.
JS: Shellycoat.
AM: Yeah.
JS: Into it.
AM: Yeah.
JS: Domovoy.
AM: Okay.
JS: A protective Russian house spirit. They are small, bearded, and usually hairy all over.
AM: That's Molly Tolken. Elf? Goblin?
JS: Like the – elf. And they sometimes have tails and little horns. Some traditions say that they take on the looks of their previous owner of the house. So, if you like sell your house, you're --
AM: Your spirit stays with it. Yeah.
JS: The Domovoy is gonna look like the previous owner.
AM: I like that. I like that.
JS: That's really cool. Most stories, they say that they live either in a stove or in a cattle shed. And, if the house they live in is kept in good order, they'll help do chores and stuff, which I think is really cute.
AM: Positive reinforcement.
JS: If it's not, he acts like a poltergeist and basically causes problems in the home.
AM: It sounds like most of the people I know who don't take care of their homes can use one of those.
JS: You can appease a Domovoy though by leaving him gifts of porridge, milk, or tobacco. And they're oracles. So, basically, if they're singing happy songs, good things are going to happen. If he strums a comb, it means someone in the house is going to get married. But, if he's screaming or wailing, misfortune is not far.
AM: Wow. It sounds like a really multifaceted and helpful spirit much like the – like Weasley time clock or something, you know, where it's like --
JS: It is. It is the Weasley time clock of --
AM: A helpful thing to have around, the anti-Doxy.
JS: All right. The Preta, found in India and China, they are supernatural humanoid spirits that undergo great suffering, especially hunger and thirst. Their like literal English translation is hungry ghost.
AM: Uhmm.
JS: They're supposed to be the spirits of greedy, lying, and jealous people. And, because of the bad karma that they experience in their life, they turn into a Preta. And they are given a particular hunger or thirst for a substance. Usually, it's something ridiculous and repulsive like cadavers or blood or like shit.
AM: Whoa. I love that. Greed is such a – is such a like superfluous thing. Like, like what marks greed is that you have what you need and yet you still want more. And, so, to have the spirit be characterized by – you know, by this like incurable wanting of --
JS: To eat shit.
AM: -- not just incurable wanting of like wine, but like incurable wanting of something that they actually shouldn't want.
JS: Yeah.
AM: Because the point of the thing, guys, is that you should, you know, accept to love what you have and not like always want for more.
JS: Okay. Great point.
AM: Thank you.
JS: The myling.
AM: The end is in sight.
JS: Myling or also known as the utburd, they are a Scandinavian phantasm form of spirits of unbaptized, babies.
AM: Okay.
JS: They roam the world trying to persuade or bother someone to give them a proper burial.
AM: Oh, no.
JS: Their origin has to do with the tradition of abandoning unwanted children in the wilderness --
AM: Julia, why did you bring this into my world?
JS: -- and then denied baptism. Oh, no. They chase wanderers at night --
AM: Why are you surprised by your own research here?
JS: I know. I forgot about this one. They chase wanderers at night and jump on their backs demanding to be taken to a graveyard to be properly buried. They grow heavier the closer they get to the graveyard. So heavy that they can --
AM: Oh, my god.
JS: -- sink the person they're riding into the dirt. If the traveler --
AM: Child abandonment is a societal issue, Julia --
JS: Yes.
AM: -- not a personal issue.
JS: I agree. If the traveler fails to get them to a graveyard, they murder them in a fit of rage.
AM: Wow. I’m so glad I know that, Julia. Thank you.
JS: You're welcome. We're on the last one.
AM: I hope you're going to end on less of a downer.
JS: It is.
AM: Okay.
JS: This is the Wolpertinger.
AM: Great name already.
JS: This is the German version of the jackalope, but, oh, so much better.
AM: Okay.
JS: It is a creature that has the head of a rabbit, the body of a squirrel.
AM: Hold on. Hold on. Let me just – let me just get this in my head. Okay. I'm ready.
JS: Head of rabbit.
AM: Yeah.
JS: Body of a squirrel.
AM: Yeah.
JS: Antlers of a deer.
AM: Yeah.
JS: Wings of a pheasant.
AM: Whoa. Little stubby wings?
JS: Well, no.
AM: Or they're – they're --
JS: Like pretty fluffy.
AM: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. They're kind of like – like a [Inaudible 31:14].
JS: Yeah. It allegedly can be found in the forest of Bavaria. And there are quite a few stuff versions that people have created that are like found throughout Germany. They're ridiculous. I will put pictures in the show notes.
AM: Thank you so much. I feel like we need to go to Bavaria. Just like all of the castles --
JS: Yeah.
AM: -- and witchy shit. Like --
JS: And like evil spirits in the Black Forest in Bavaria.
AM: Exactly. Great beer. Monk beer, the best kind of beer.
JS: Good, good cheese too.
AM: Good cheese.
JS: Monk cheese.
AM: Have to plan on this. Bavarian Tourist Bureau, if you are looking for --
JS: Sponsor us.
AM: If you're looking for some, some, some nice millennials with web presences to come to raise the profile Bavaria, you got us.
JS: And that, Amanda, is 30 fucking myths.
AM: Yes. Oh, feel so good.
JS: I feel really good about that.
AM: And we probably – we were 30 this year too.
JS: Yeah.
AM: We just made it – made it happen.
JS: Yeah. We still got like five more years.
AM: We do. We do our babies.
JS: We did good.
AM: Y'all, thank you so much for being with us. I don't even know what to say, because this, this podcast has like changed my life.
JS: It really has.
AM: It really has.
JS: I was just thinking about that. I'm like I'm in such a better place than I was last February.
AM: I know. We were both like --
JS: Because of this podcast.
AM: Yeah. And whatever. Like October, November I think of 2015. Like we were both feeling really unfulfilled at work and like creatively stymied. And like we wanted to – you know, we just needed something to work on. And this has brought so many new people into our lives.
JS: And so much joy to the two of us that we get to spend it with you guys. And --
AM: Yeah.
JS: -- we get to hear how happy we make you, and how happy you make us.
AM: You teach us things. We teach you things. Just like hearing how, you know, we're part of your driving to work or you're doing the dishes or, you know, you save it for when your husband gets home from work. Like it just – every single one of those anecdotes really honestly, truly, warms my, my cold, cold selkie heart.
JS: I love your cold, cold selkie heart though.
AM: Thanks, Jules. And thank you for being such a wonderful podcasting partner and doing all the research.
JS: Thank you for running everything else basically.
AM: All right. We need to talk about Wario when we turn this microphone off.
JS: Fucking Wario. And, so, that's our myths. Everyone, stay creepy.
AM: Stay cool.
Outro Music
AM: Spirits was created by Julia Schifini and me, Amanda McLoughlin. It's edited by Eric Schneider with music by Kevin MacLeod and visual design by Allyson Wakeman.
JS: Subscribe to Spirits on your preferred podcast app to make sure you never miss an episode. You can find us on Twitter, Facebook, and Tumblr @SpiritsPodcast.
AM: On our Patreon page, patreon.com/spiritspodcast, you can sign up for exclusive content like behind the scenes photos, audio extras, director's commentary, blooper reels, and beautiful recipe cards with custom drink and snack pairings.
JS: If you like the show, please share with your friends and leave us a review on iTunes. It really does help.
AM: Thank you so much for listening, ‘til next time.
Transcriptionist: Rachelle Rose Bacharo
Editor: Krizia Casil