Episode 11: Golem (with Eric Silver)
/Kicking it old school in Dark Age Eastern Europe this week with special guest Eric Silver! We missed out on the manischewitz, but we have lots of Jewish lore, Yiddish insults, and pop culture references for you to enjoy. Find Eric on Twitter @El_Silvero.
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Our music is "Danger Storm" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com). Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/
Transcript
AM: So, we are so pleased to welcome today my friend, one-time colleague, classmate, Eric Silver. Welcome.
ES: Oh, that's right, you can't see me dancing.
AM: No.
JS: No. dancing.
JS: No dancing.
ES: Because I'm in an – I'm in an audio platform.
AM: You're own WWE entrance dance.
ES: Ahhhhhh!
JS: With the fake cheering in the background, of course.
ES: Ahhhhhh!
AM: And, Julia, what are we drinking today?
JS: Well, we're drinking beer.
AM: We are.
JS: We were going to drink – what were we going to drink?
ES: We're --
JS: Go ahead.
AM: The gross Passover wine?
JS: Yes.
ES: We were going to drink Manischewitz, because why would we talk about Eastern Europe, Europe, Jews without Manischewitz. But, of course, somehow I can't find it. So --
AM: Yes. It is – it is not High Holidays here in the Upper East Side. So, there is no Manischewitz to be found.
ES: That's right.
JS: So, we are drinking today, Anderson Valley Briney Melon Gose, which was my choice. I got it from work. Super, super good.
AM: Somewhat arbitrarily.
JS: Hey, I mean, I like gose. I always get gose.
AM: But there is some metaphorical resonance.
ES: Yeah.
AM: That works.
ES: It's salty, it's briny, and it's all we have. Just like the Jews of Eastern Europe would have drank.
AM: That's as good a segway as any of them.
ES: We're doing a lot of this. Just like – everyone should just like prep themselves.
JS: We're going in.
ES: Exactly. Go – I'm going for the Yeshiva crowd to bring them into your podcast.
AM: We are so ready, and they are so welcome.
Intro Music
ES: All right. So, we're talking about the Golem of Prague. There are many golems over time --
AM: Okay.
ES: -- that have been developed by random Jews that have needed them. But the most famous one is the Golem of Prague.
JS: Okay. Hold up.
AM: Let's pause.
JS: We're gonna have you tell us what a Golem is because some of our listeners might not know.
ES: Oh, of course.
AM: Yeah. So, is a golem a genre or is it like one figure that pops up across different, you know, folklore traditions?
ES: So, the Golem itself is like a character --
AM: Okay.
ES: -- who shows up. Golem itself is like a Hebrew word that means like change or – and I will fact check that later. I do that because I read it, but I totally forgot.
AM: Listen standards are low, we are drunk.
ES: Exactly. Exactly. I'm feeling real briny right now.
JS: We'll fact check when we're dead or sober!
AM: That's why this podcast is a thing. We're like, we have to do no preparation. We just have to sit here and talk about our myths.
ES: Exactly. So, it's like – so, there's this idea obviously in Judeo-Christian creation that you can just make things out of the earth, and you say a thing or you write a thing-
AM: Yeah.
ES: -you use words. And then it becomes a thing.
AM: Right. Adam out of soil. Eve out of Adam's rib.
JS: Yeah.
ES: Exactly. So --
AM: Golem out of --
JS: God breathe life into Adam --
AM: Yes.
JS: -- and created him out of the Earth.
ES: And, just as much as our Judeo-Christian God, he says, let there be light, and then there is light. He said you use words to create effect.
JS: Yes.
ES: So, this is the same thing. There is this thing that you make out of mud, and you use the name of God or you say a certain kind of words because Jewish magicians – it's Kabbalah.
AM: Sure.
JS: Yes.
ES: Jewish magicians, they're crazy. So, they’re just like let’s make some stuff.
AM: And words have real meaning.
ES: Exactly.
AM: You know, I love that about the Jewish tradition as well.
ES: Yeah, we're pretty – we're pretty cool.
AM: Pretty wordsmith, [inaudible 3:14]?
ES: Exactly. That's why --
AM: We're pretty briny.
ES: Exactly. That's why Billy Crystal can get all of those women in all of those romantic comedies.
JS: What?
AM: Is that why?
ES: The power of words.
JS: Is that why?
ES: Oh, tell me – tell me if Meg Ryan is going to fall in love with him in Harry Met Sally.
JS: Never.
AM: Never.
ES: Never
JS: Amanda has never seen that movie. Let's just – let's just put it out there.
ES: So, you can make a Golem out of a lot of different ways. So, the first thing you do, you got to take some mud and some dirt, and you make it into a human form of some sort. Usually, Golems are huge, because why would you not have a huge thing that you could what to do?
JS: It takes a lot of time to make little Golems.
AM: While you're at it, make it big.
ES: Exactly. You can have a tiny --
AM: Go or go bigger home.
ES: Exactly. You got to go big or go home. And then you can do a bunch of things. So, there are many ways to make a Golem, all of them involve words. First of all, you can walk around it seven times while saying god's secret name.
AM: Okay.
ES: Because God has a secret name, obviously.
AM: Yeah.
JS: Is it Yahweh? Or, it's just like --
ES: That's the shortening of the secret name.
JS: Okay. All right.
AM: [inaudible 4:07]
ES: Yes. But there's like the real one and like some people know it, but it's like lost with the time.
AM: Oh, OK. Cool.
ES: Because why would you have a name that wasn't lost with the time.
AM: No. If, if we had it now, we would have just destroyed ourselves.
ES: Exactly.
JS: There would just be Golems just walking around all over the place.
AM: Yeah. Like levying taxes and doing bad things.
JS: Sure.
ES: That would be horrible. You're can write a word on the golem's head, which is, Emet which means truth. But then, if you or anyone already killed the golem, you erase the aleph. So, it just becomes mem tav, which is like me – meth – met, which is dead. It means death.
AM: Interesting.
ES: Words, words, words. The Kabbalah is really into words.
AM: Yeah.
JS: Truth to death.
ES: Yes.
JS: That's weird.
ES: Exactly.
AM: That's very convenient, right?
JS: Yeah.
AM: You, you erase one letter and, bam, you've, you know, changed the- the meaning.
ES: Exactly. You just like change it. And then like the numbers are different because you can assign – you assign number values to Jewish letters. That's like a whole thing. Anyway – or, you can write God's full name on a piece of paper, and just like slap it on the golem.
AM: Bam!
JS: Nice!
ES: And then you then you can like – then you're like, "I don't want this anymore." You just like pull it off and then he dies again.
JS: Oh, yeah.
AM: Very – it sounds like an on and off switch.
ES: Exactly.
AM: Great.
ES: Yeah. So, golems are really interesting too, because they can't speak.
AM: Huh.
ES: So, the whole thing is that you say the words. But, of course, the Golem doesn't have a soul. So, he can't say things himself.
JS: So --
AM: Total sense.
JS: -- my question is because I'm going back to like my Judeo-Christian Genesis thing. Is it that like, in Kabbalah in this like, Jewish magician thing, they're kind of going off the, "We're created in God's image," and like can do what God does but from a lesser extent?
ES: Kind…
JS: So, I like we can't make humans.
AM: Yeah. Are these like priests? Are they, you know – or whatever. Are they like rabbis and important people? Or, is it anyone can do a golem if they know how?
ES: They're closer to a rabbi. They are rabbis, but they're also like mystics. So, like it's a lot on the words themselves. Like, you can look at the words that are in the Torah, and they mean certain things. That's why you ascribe numbers to them. You ascribe deeper meanings to them. And you can use them for magical ways.
JS: You got to like feel them. Like, you know? in Harry Potter, a Muggle could say a spell, but the spell won't work because they don't have like the magic in them, and they don't like, have that shit.
AM: Slash, like you have to – you have to access the- the meaning behind the words. You have to learn, you know? the Torah. You have to learn Hebrew. You have to learn, you know, all the letters and numbers and [inaudible 6:17].
ES: Exactly. You got to study it, and, first of all, there was never any Hanukkah celebrations at Hogwarts. There are no – I just want to point, point that out.
JS: Which is like a fucking shame, right?
ES: So, we're hanging out in Prague, right?
JS: Prague.
ES: And, as things happen in Prague – so, this was around the time of like the pogroms and tons of people don't like Jews --
AM: Yeah.
ES: -- as you do. So --
JS: As you do, the world will do.
AM: Unfortunately, as they all do.
ES: Exactly, as they all do. This could be any place, which is why there are Golems everywhere. But --
AM: So, as a – as a quick interstitial thing, so, golems have been around for a long, long time in Judaism. But there are certain Golems that have had like, you know, lasting power and stories. Is that how it works?
ES: Yeah, like, they have – they're like the most famous. I mean when you can tie --
AM: Yeah.
ES: -- something back to a place where it's like exclusively Jewish towns when they're like The Rabbi's with the capital letters --
AM: Yeah, yeah.
ES: -- and this guy has like a nickname so you know he's a big deal, that's a big thing. And the rabbi --
AM: Yeah.
JS: When you have nickname in history, it's big fucking deal.
AM: Yeah. You’ve been remembered.
ES: Exactly.
AM: Cool.
ES: All right. So, we got this rabbi. His name is Yehuda Loew, but he is known as the Maharal of Prague.
AM: Sounds magical.
ES: It's very magical.
JS: It sounds fancy as shit.
ES: So, he's super fancy. He's very fancy as the name.
JS: He sounds like a character that they would put into Indiana Jones to make something sound foreign.
ES: Exactly. That – well, that's Indiana Jones and the Golem of Prague.
JS: That's perfect. I want to watch that movie.
AM: Amazing. [inaudible 7:40] being named.
ES: Ta-ta-ra-ta. Ta-ta-ra.
JS: They are making Indiana Jones 5. So, we could get there.
ES: Ta-ta-ra-ta. Ta-ta-ra-ta. Ta-ta-ra.
JS: Get there. Get there in time to [inaudible 7:44].
AM: Get in touch.
JS: We'll write that script for you, Steven Spielberg.
ES: Rabbi, throw me the whip. Psssh! All right. Alright, so, about this time, it's like, depending on who's in power – like everyone's a monarchy right now even in Prague. So --
AM: What century are we in?
ES: I think it's the --
AM: Not to put you on the spot.
ES: -- 14th century?
JS: Okay.
AM: Okay.
ES: It's 1500.
AM: Cool
EM: So, we're like – we're right in the pogroms.
AM: Right in the printing press era.
JS: We're like – we're like Black Death going into Renaissance in Eastern Europe.
ES: Exactly.
JS: Okay.
ES: Well, we're definitely still in the Black Death. So, at this moment, the King Rudolf – why do kings have horrible names? I don't know, man.
AM: I don't know.
ES: King Rudolf is friends with the Maharal, because the Maharal, he's very smart. He's hanging out in Prague.
AM: Of course. He's powerful.
ES: Exactly. He's making everyone --
JS: Chill as fuck.
ES: -- chill, chill as fuck, because like Jews just like hanging out. Like, it's fun. So, they're having a conversation. They're like kicking it on like somewhere in the palace --
JS: In the palace, yeah.
ES: -- as you do. And the Maharal is like, "Hey, King Rudolf, you know this thing where all of your people think we kill babies and put it in our Matzah?"
AM: Nope.
JS: That's like – that's like the worst --
AM: Not a thing.
JS: That's the worst like --
ES: Oh, it's super a thing, because the blood --
JS: Really?
ES: This is called the blood libel.
AM: Oh, no.
ES: The blood libel is literally the lie about blood.
AM: Right.
ES: It's that Jews, as they're super sneaky, go out. They steal Christian babies.
AM: Why?
ES: They kill them.
AM: No.
ES: They blood let them and put them in their Matzah because --
AM: Not a thing.
ES: So, this is like around Passover.
AM: Where in the matzah would they – would they put them? The Matzah is very flat.
JS: It's so white. It's so white.
AM: It's very white, and they're also flat.
ES: Well, I, I don't know. I don't know, man.
JS: They- they bleach the blood before putting it in the Matzah.
AM: Oh, no.
ES: So, sneaky Jews.
AM: Not a thing.
ES: Bleaching blood.
AM: Oh, right. With magic and whatever.
ES: Exactly. So, like this thing has been around forever.
AM: Yeah.
ES: I think it has something to do with like just kosher rituals and like you don't eat breads. Like, Matzah's weird --
AM: Yeah.
ES: -- when you think about it. So, it's like how do you make this?
JS: So, it’s like the staple of Eastern Europe during the time. They're like why the fuck are you eating --
ES: Oh, no. It's like it's Passover. Well, it's Passover and like --
AM: Yeah.
ES: -- people are eating bread because that's all you can eat in Eastern Europe. That and like potatoes.
AM: Yeah. And also like, you know, ascribing the- the worst possible fear to the other who's easy to, you know, make seem evil.
ES: Exactly. So, this is like this huge thing. It's been going on for a really long time, and the Maharal is like, "King Rudolf --
AM: Let's do this.
ES: -- let's, let's stop this." And he's like, "I'm taking care of it. Not many people believe it anymore.
JS: I don’t know.
ES: It's fine." So, the Maharal's like, "All right, that's dope." And then he leaves – he leaves and goes back to the jew- jew- the Jewish ghetto.
JS: That's just like he couldn't fight for himself. He's like, "Okay, if you say so." He's like that passive, aggressive intern who like, you know, can't get the promotion that they want.
AM: Slash, like the boss who's like, "Come on, kid. I'll help you out." And you're like, "Okay, boss. Thanks."
ES: Exactly. It's the exact --
JS: Yeah. Yeah. I got it.
ES: Well, I mean, what are you going to do? You got this king who somehow likes you and doesn't want to murder you exclusively.
AM: Yeah. Plus, you're an unprotected minority. What are you going to do?
ES: Exactly, and, like many stories that you have told on this podcast and all the time, there is an evil sorcerer who lives in the palace.
JS: Oh, yeah!
AM: Amazing.
JS: He's like literally Aladdin right now, and I'm totally into it.
ES: His – his name is Thaddeus.
JS: Oh, that's such a good name though.
AM: Okay, cool.
ES: He's an evil priest who hates Jews.
AM: Either a lawyer or an evil priest who hates Jews.
ES: Exactly. He's an evil priest who hates Jews, and he's also like dividing the Christian arts of dark – like the dark magic. Didn't know that was a thing.
JS: Christian Arts of Dark Magic?
AM: Slash, it sounds like he's appropriating his perception of Jewish traditions for himself.
ES: I don't know, man. He just like – he just hates Jews. So, it's a good read. That's just like a --
AM: Unfortunately, not uncommon.
ES: Exactly. He's just like one of those guys. So, he's the one who has been spreading the blood libel. And he's like really mad about it. It's like I can imagine like the Maharal's like leaving, and he like sees Thaddeus in the – in the shadows. And he's like, "Oh, I'm gonna get you." And he's like, "I don't know what you're talking about."
JS: With his serpent staff.
ES: His serpent staff.
AM: Yeah.
ES: He's basically Jafar.
JS: He's Jafar.
ES: He’s basically Jafar.
JS: That's what I'm saying.
ES: All right. So --
JS: That’s how I'm gonna picture him for the rest of the podcast.
ES: You should.
AM: Right. Turban and all. Yes.
ES: Absolutely. Well, yeah. In the Eastern Europe, in the, in the Dark Ages.
AM: The very, very Christian guy. Yeah.
JS: And are there any other Thaddeus?
ES: You look stupid with turban. So, the Maharal's like, "You know what? I'm dealing with this myself," because like the Jews are going to be in danger no matter what.
AM: Yeah.
ES: So, like, he goes back to his home, and he falls asleep at --
JS: Terrible idea.
ES: -- nighttime --
AM: Like, you --
JS: Never fall asleep.
ES: -- as you do, because either you get killed or the other thing. He has a divine vision!
AM: Oh, yes!.
JS: Yes.
ES: And the words of the Kabbalah come down, and they rearrange themselves. And they tell him, "You should make a Golem." So, he's like --
JS: Logical assumption. What? I did that before.
AM: Yeah. But like wouldn't, wouldn't a gigantic enforcer – you know? 14th century Hodor be useful?
JS: Hodor.
AM: Of course, it would.
ES: Basically.
JS: It's based on the Hodor reference.
ES: Based in Hodor.
JS: The season just started.
AM: We're diversifying. Or, Hagrid.
ES: He's like, "All right." So, he gets his, his son-in-law to come. And he gets his like most – like, uhh best student.
AM: Best student. Yeah.
ES: His best student because he's a rabbi. He got – he got students for days. And then it's like I am – it's like the middle of the night and it's cloudy. And they go down into like the Moldau River, which I assume is also cloudy.
JS: It was a dark and stormy night.
ES: And then like they just like get a bunch of mud. And they make them into a giant.
AM: Love it.
ES: And then they stand there. And they're like, "Okay, what do we do?" And the Maharal's like, "All right." So, this is the – this is the walk around one.”
AM: Yes.
ES: It's this story.
AM: Seven times.
ES: Seven times.
JS: With the carved thing.
ES: No, no. It's just you just say it.
JS: Oh, okay.
ES: You just say it. So, he, he's like, "All right. So, you walk around seven times, and you say this." So, that happens. And he's like, "Yeah, all right. Now, you walk around the other way seven times.”
AM: Yes.
ES: And you say this.
AM: Gotta get that widdershins compliment.
JS: And it's always seven. It's always that like, you know, arithmancy.
AM: Seven times three. Right. Three people doing it seven times each.
JS: Yeah.
AM: That's, that's quite mystical.
ES: Exactly. Exactly. And then he do it one – he does it one more time.
AM: Yeah.
ES: And then he opens his eyes and like, in some stories, he like grows hair. In some stories, he like has fingers now.
AM: Oooh!
ES: But he's like – just this like naked mud giant who can't say anything.
AM: Amazing.
JS: Also, they didn't think to give him fingers? Like how is he gonna like open doors and shit?
AM: Julia, you can only be so [inaudible 14:00] with your mud sculpting.
JS: Listen.
AM: Come on.
JS: If they made him into a giant, you would assume that there's like enough depth for them to be --
AM: I don't know. But to build them a --
JS: -- put fingers and stuff.
AM: It's dark. It’s sweaty.
JS: I mean it's – it's pre-Renaissance too. So, I get it. Everything's flat and dark. But, I guess --
ES: In the pre-Renaissance, everything's flat and dark.
JS: I mean like, you know, compare like pre-Renaissance stuff to then like the sculpture of --
AM: Artwise?
JS: Yeah, art-wise. The sculpture of --
AM: Yeah, like the one with --
JS: Daniel.
AM: Yeah. Yeah.
ES: Yes.
AM: Well, I'm not judging. They literally pulled life out of mud.
JS: Yeah.
AM: You know, they have my two thumbs up.
ES: All right. So, they have this giant mud dude, who can't say anything. And, so, there are a bunch of different stories about this. Some say that they make him do chores around the Jewish ghetto. He's like – he's chopping wood. He's carrying stuff.
AM: Oh, no.
ES: Because he's a giant.
AM: Cleaning sewers.
ES: Yes, absolutely. He's like up high. He's like cleaning gutters and roofs and stuff.
AM: Slash, like, in the absence of city services, probably they were discriminated against, right? By like the crowd and the ghetto wasn't attended as other neighborhoods.
JS: Their part of the city was probably shitty.
AM: Right.
ES: Exactly.
AM: You draw out your own municipal service.
ES: Exactly.
AM: I get it.
ES: But the big thing obviously when he's not chopping wood is he's defending the Jewish ghetto.
JS: Chopping heads?
ES: Chops.
JS: Yes. Wooh.
ES: He is – yes. He's defending the ghetto. In the – in the story that I read recently to prepare for this, it was like you defend the Jewish ghetto like it's the apple of your eye, which I did not know was a phrase.
JS: Was a phrase early on.
AM: Yeah. [inaudible 15:27]
ES: Exactly. Good translations.
AM: All right. If the - if you're --
JS: I want to know where they --
AM: If you're a Patreon, you'll get a director's commentary in your email, and we will let you know what's the origin of ‘apple of our eyes’ is.
ES: Exactly.
JS: We don't know right now, but we'll find out for you.
AM: Exactly.
ES: All right. So, this guy is hanging out. The – he's like walking around. People are gawking at him, and there's a subplot.
AM: Oh!
The B plot of this is that there is a – Jews were moneylenders, because --
AM: Right.
ES: -- at the time, banks didn't exist and like, dealing with money was like looked down upon.
AM: Yeah.
ES: So, like, this guy was lending stuff out. This really rich guy, he lent a butcher – a Christian butcher like 5,000 crowns, which is a ton of money.
AM: It sounds like a lot of money.
ES: It's a lot of money, and, of course, like he won't pay him back. Like, he bothers him, and bothers him, and bothers him. And he's like, "Oh, no. I just don't have it."
JS: Also, the butcher is a Christian. He shouldn't be taking loans of money. Like that's not --
AM: I think they can take it, but they can't loan it.
JS: That's dumb.
AM: I think that was – I think the __ is against __. [16:25]
JS: That's, that's a double standard, and I don't like it.
AM: I know.
ES: Right. So, there's this thing that, since he's like the butcher and the slaughterer of pigs, he brings – he has to like walk through – the butcher needs to walk through the city with like all of his meat. It's like the easiest way to get to the market or something.
AM: Okay.
ES: I'm not exactly sure. So, it turns out that this butcher started the blood libel lie to get out of paying his debt. And like evil --
AM: Oh, shit.
JS: [Inaudible 16:50].
ES: -- and the evil priest, Thaddeus, was like, "That's a great idea. Let's talk about that."
AM: Oh, shit!
JS: What the fuck? Butcher and Thaddeus, what the fuck are you doing?
AM: Ugh! Good job.
JS: [inaudible 16:59]?
AM: Good job, butcher.
ES: So, the butcher is horrible. I'm so glad – this is so nice you guys are just like I hate that guy. I hate Jafar. I hate the butcher.
AM: Sure. We're the ultimate mythology hype women.
ES: I know.
AM: T-shirt.
ES: I like it. Also, that's perfect. And just like both you just like heads there.
AM: Gosh.
JS: Hera hype woman should be a t-shirt.
AM: Yeah. Slash, like as, as people raised Christian. So sorry.
JS: Our bad.
AM: Our bad.
ES: I'm just enjoying this so much.
AM: Good.
JS: Also, like breaking in for a second, the golem seems very like 400 years before Frankenstein. But Frankenstein's story, to me --
AM: Yeah. I was thinking about that too. Yeah.
JS: -- which is like super cool, right?
AM: Yeah.
JS: And like you would hope that a golem doesn't like going to a murderous rampage or anything like Frankenstein monster does. But --
AM: Right. Because like the idea of golem being sentient.
JS: Yeah.
AM: Golem acquiring language. Like, the whole – the whole kind of plot twist in Frankenstein is that the creature acquires language.
JS: Right.
AM: Yeah.
JS: And like becomes a being before it gets killed, but --
AM: Whatever.
ES: All right.
AM: That's a really interesting metaphor for education, right? Like without – without education and command of language, like you can't, you know, affect any change or being kind of self-aware.
JS: You don't have a soul, basically.
AM: Exactly. Yeah.
ES: I have no research on the education one, but I do have research on Frankenstein.
JS: Yes, called it.
ES: Points. Points. Points. Points.
JS: Points. We should have a point system for this show, just saying.
AM: All right. I'm down. Let's just do it.
ES: That's true. So, cutting, cutting over there. I really like this. So, Frankenstein. The Hulk is also known as a golem.
JS: Oh yeah!
AM: Oh!
ES: Because, even though it was like a supposedly an accident, we are messing with like nuclear reactors.
JS: Gamma rays.
ES: Gamma rays.
AM: Yes.
ES: And like you are trying to do something. And you're creating this thing. Like the Hulk --
AM: And like does he have a soul? Question mark. That's like a thing.
JS: Yes.
ES: Exactly. Is he just like an extension?
AM: Doesn’t have language.
JS: He can't die from natural means.
AM: Yeah.
ES: And he can't speak in real sentences.
AM: Right. He doesn't have language. Yeah.
JS: ‘Hulk smash’, is basically the only thing he can say.
ES: Exactly.
AM: Yeah. Yeah. Oh, man.
ES: The other thing, which is actually really cool about the Golem, is that he's the inspiration for robots. So, the word robot actually is – comes from to Czech brothers, Josef and Karel Capek, who were living in Prague.
JS: They wrote a play about it, right, or something.
ES: Yes,
JS: Yes! I remember this.
ES: It's called – it's called like R.U.R.
AM: Huh.
ES: It's about like the first robot. Like, creating something sentient out of metal.
AM: Right.
JS: It's so amazing.
ES: It is literally. That's where the word robot comes from; this play and the story. And it's from Prague. So, it's literally from exactly the same place.
JS: Prague!
AM: Golem, the OG robot.
JS: Yes.
ES: But it's also – fun fact, the word, glitch is from Yiddish as well.
JS: Really?
ES: That might be why – where it comes --
AM: That is so cool.
ES: That might be where it comes from. I just thought of that, but I don't have research.
AM: What does it mean in Yiddish? Same thing?
ES: That's the word.
AM: Yeah.
ES: It's like it got pulled to English. It's really just like a small thing that messes things up. But like I assume – I haven't read that play, but I assume since robots are involved, that the robot goes and kills people because there was a glitch in the system!
JS: That's so fantastic.
AM: Thank you, Yiddish.
JS: I love it.
ES: Thank you. Thank you, Yiddish.
JS: God bless, Yiddish.
ES: Okay. So, there's a lot of other stuff that's happening at the same time. So, like the butcher, there's that B plot.
AM: Yes.
ES: There's another thing where the Golem is like supposedly falls in love with the rabbi's daughter.
JS: Ahh…
AM: Cool.
ES: I don't know about that one. I don't know. There's another one where --
AM: It's like a renaissance insertion. Pre-Renaissance lore.
JS: Yeah.
ES: Exactly.
JS: They were like, "We've got to write something that Shakespeare wouldn't write.” Golem falls in love with a woman.
AM: Off-brand Shakespeare. Like off --
JS: Comma tragedy.
AM: Like off-brand Captain Crunch.
JS: Yes.
AM: Like Captain – you know? Whatever Chew.
JS: That totally is the name.
AM: Like, slightly like the original thing.
JS: Sure.
AM: But not quite copyright infringement.
JS: It's Lieutenant Chew then.
ES: It's Admiral – It's Admiral Chew to you. Rear Admiral – Rear Admiral Chew. That's horrible.
AM: Sounds like a brand of tobacco.
JS: Yeah.
ES: That sounds like a rejected West Wing character.
AM: It does.
ES: Rear Admiral Chew. He's not allowed to go in the walk and talk, because he can't walk and chew gum at the same time. Ba-dum-tsss!
AM: Love it.
JS: So, what else does this Golem get up to?
ES: Right. So, the golem gets over that. The other thing is that like, as most things that you create, there are some like glitches in the system.
AM: Yeah.
ES: So, like you need to turn off the golem before sundown on Friday, on Shabbat.
AM: Sabbath. Yeah.
ES: Because it's a Jewish Golem.
AM: Yeah.
ES: So, like he supposedly freaks out.
JS: He can't work.
ES: Yeah, he freaks out if he's still alive.
AM: Yeah. He has life.
JS: Right.
AM: Yeah.
ES: So, like – he's like pulling out trees. It's like it's sundown on Friday, and he's like losing his mind. And you have to like – this is the – this is the head one when you have the thing on the head. So, like you can literally just like try to erase it or you like pull the – because it's a lot harder to like walk around a raging --
AM: Of course.
JS: Yeah.
ES: -- monster. But you can like pull the thing off of him.
JS: Plus, it's a very wide circle.
ES: Yeah. He's like running around the entire city.
JS: Like, Jesus Christ, just standstill.
ES: Yeah. And you have to do it seven times.
AM: Not Jesus Christ.
JS: Not Jesus Christ. My bad.
ES: Yeah. Definitely wrong. Definitely wrong.
JS: Damn Abraham, standstill. Yeah.
AM: Yeah, yeah.
JS: Yeah. It rhymes too.
ES: Of course.
AM: Is there – is there equivalent to like Jesus fucking Christ in, in Yiddish or Jewish tradition?
ES: Just like – well, Yiddish is really funny, because --
AM: I mean you don't – you don't take God's name in vain. Like that- that shit is serious. Yeah.
ES: Yes. But Yiddish is crazy, because it's really just like stacking German words so that you're swearing at non-Jews.
AM: Yeah.
JS: Love it.
ES: Yiddish is just like all about like putting curses on people, telling them that they're horrible, that their body parts are going to explode, that like, yeah, they should stop –
JS: Oh!
AM: What?
ES: -they should stop bothering you and leave you alone. Yiddish is –
JS: [inaudible 22:10]
ES: So, like all of Yiddish.
AM: Yeah.
ES: Like you don't need specific phrases. It's just like all of Yiddish.
JS: All of Yiddish.
AM: Yeah. That's just like the, the default mode.
ES: Exactly. It's like someone just like took German and was just like --
AM: Just to make it sassier.
ES: I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. You're cool. I hate you. That's just like – that's Yiddish.
AM: Amazing.
ES: So --
JS: Yeah.
ES: Yes, exactly. You're eating stuff. But the thing you're eating isn't great. So, you got to bitch about it. All right.
AM: Yeah. Amazing.
ES: So – okay. So, we got all these B plots, right?
AM: Yeah.
ES: So, the butcher is finally like spreading all these rumors. And he's going to do something to get out of his money. So, because, you know, the Jews --
AM: The greedy bastard.
ES: Yeah. And, if the Jews are dead, you don't have to pay back your debts.
AM: I guess that's true.
JS: I also picture the butcher as Danny DeVito. I don't know why.
ES: That's fair.
AM: I was picturing Mario Batali.
JS: Way better! Way better! Can we do a cross between those two for the butcher?
AM: I guess it'd just be slightly shorter and less pink than Mario Batali.
ES: And in Crocs.
JS: I was going to say Danny DeVito, but with a blonde ponytail.
AM: That's fine/terrible.
ES: So, the butcher is in his Crocs for the – these Eastern European Crocs.
AM: That’s great.
ES: And he's like just --
AM: Great. Clogs. I mean not far off.
ES: Oh, just – literally, just --
AM: Not far off. Boom!
ES: Yeah. Literally just orange clogs – just orange clogs.
AM: Got it.
ES: So, of course, we're in the gross part as, as a climax is going to give you.
AM: Of the myth or of the city?
ES: Of the – of the myth.
AM: Okay.
ES: We're in the climax. This is all happening.
AM: Okay.
ES: So, the butcher is like, "All right, I'm gonna hit this on the head. It's around Passover time."
AM: Yeah.
ES: So, the Jews are making Matzah. Everyone's scared. Let's do it.
AM: Right. It's the dumb baby story I made up.
ES: Right, exactly.
JS: Yeah.
ES: Let's, let's do it. So, it turns out one of his friends had a child, a daughter.
AM: Okay.
ES: And the daughter had died a few days earlier.
JS: I think you’re going to say he steals the baby and kills it. And then --
ES: Well, this is not much better.
AM: Slightly less terrible.
AM: Yes.
ES: So, it's buried --
AM: Exploits the death of a child.
ES: Exactly.
JS: Yeah. That's still pretty terrible.
ES: He literally – he – no. He exhumes the grave.
AM: Ohhhh.
JS: Ohhh, dude!
ES: There it is, which is worse.
JS: No.
ES: And then he takes a pig carcass.
JS: No...
ES: He pulls out the guts.
JS: No...
ES: Puts the baby in it.
AM: Please don't.
ES: Puts the guts back on top of it. And like, while he's on his like butcher run, drops the pig in the ghetto and then like runs away.
JS: Why? Why Danny DeVito? Why?
AM: It's a fucked up Turducken.
ES: It's a Turducken of shame of horror, because like, well, the pig is not kosher. There's a baby in it. And the Jews are like if someone sees this here --
JS: Oh, god.
ES: -- we are literally – everyone's gonna die.
AM: We're dead.
ES: We're literally just dead.
JS: I'm sure the baby isn't kosher either. That's all I'm saying.
ES: That's fair. That's a fair statement. So --
AM: So, what do they do?
ES: So, they- they're all freaking out. And then someone like looks --
AM: Is it Shabbat still or we’re on Passover?
ES: No, this is – we're just like -- we're – it's Passover now.
AM: Okay.
JS: [inaudible 24:49]
ES: So, like everyone's just like running around freaking out. And like someone turns to the left and was like, "Hey, who's that guy tied up on the tree?" It's the butcher. Here's what happened.
JS: The Golem's got the butcher!
ES: Exactly.
AM: What?
JS: Yes!!
ES: So they're like, "Hey, who's that Christian guy tied up on the tree?" The Golem, who was like – who was thinking to himself and like, "That seems creepy." He like grabs him, roughs him up a little bit, ties him up, put him on the tree, and then --
AM: Amazing.
ES: -- and then runs away.
AM: Smart. Smart.
ES: The Golem's just like, "I don't want to stick around. Bye," and runs away.
AM: Did what he had to do.
ES: And then, so, they bring the butcher to King Rudolf. And they're like, "This guy did a gross thing."
AM: Yeah.
ES: And King Rudolf's like, "Okay, we're done with the blood libel. No more. We're done."
JS: This guy did a gross thing, possibly illegal thing? Maybe?
AM: Yeah.
ES: Definitely. Definitely, illegal.
JS: He dug up a baby.
AM: Certainly, unethical.
ES: Definitely, illegal. And the Kings like, "Okay, we're done with the blood libel. No more. Thaddeus, get out of here." And he's like, "Noooo!"
AM: Right. Bye.
JS: Fuck you, Jafar.
ES: And then Jafar is like, "Nooo!" And, so --
AM: The sand dune collapses.
ES: Exactly, on top of him and they're like, "Where did we get the sand in Prague?"
JS: And then turns into the Genie and then gets sucked into the lamp.
ES: All right. So, we're in the conclusion now. So, like the Golem – like everything's pretty cool in Prague for a – for a second.
JS: Good job, Golem.
AM: For a half-second.
ES: They don't need the Golem anymore, because he might be in love with a human daughter.
AM: Dangerous.
ES: He might be super dangerous. Exactly.
AM: Right.
ES: So, they tell the golem --
AM: GTFOH.
ES: They're much nicer about it actually.
AM: Thank you, Golem, for your service.
ES: Exactly. They go to the attic of a synagogue.
AM: Okay.
ES: And they're like, "Golem, lay down," and he lays down. It was like, "All right, go to sleep. Just chill out. You're fine." And the Golem's like, "Okay."
ES: No.
JS: And then they killed him.
ES: No, not exactly. They reversed the thing.
JS: Yes. So now, he's dead.
ES: Tell him – it's more of like going to sleep. Like, eternal sleep.
AM: But it's like – yeah. You're like – they're like mythically unmaking him.
ES: Yeah.
JS: How would you feel about being unmade, Amanda?
AM: I thought I'd be unmade and murdered by a freaking libelist, Christian butcher.
JS: That’s true.
ES: Or Jafar.
JS: Or Jafar.
AM: Or Jafar.
ES: Or the pogroms.
AM: None of those seem good.
ES: Exactly. It's all pretty bad. So, they do the thing. And like, I imagine, there's like a swell of like orchestra music.
AM: Like the wind.
ES: Like really sad.
JS: Yeah.
ES: The awesome thing with like most stories is that the golem is just like asleep and like underneath like all these like prayer shawls and like books in this attic in Prague somewhere.
AM: Still there.
ES: And he's still there
AM: Sleeper cell.
JS: Have we like gone to all the synagogues and tried to track down the Golem? Because I feel like that should be a thing.
ES: Well, it's just like there's this other trope in Jewish literature where – which you might know from Michael Chabon in The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier & Clay and like some other short stories or some other stuff and even in the X Files --
AM: Yes.
ES: -- which was inspired by this. It's that like, if the Jews ever need him again, they can go there. But then it becomes like a whole Holocaust thing. It's like could have they gone there when all that stuff – because that's the last – the other time when like all of Eastern Europe was messed up.
JS: The butcher of Prague and shit like.
ES: Exactly.
AM: Yeah.
ES: The blood libel came up with all --
AM: That would have been the perfect time for it. Right. Right.
ES: -- the with all the propaganda as well.
JS: Also, that's very like Batman. Like, "When we need him, he will come."
AM: Yeah.
JS: That kind of thing.
AM: Yeah. He's there for us. Yeah, and like, out of the firmament that God gave us --
JS: Yes.
AM: Right, like we can draw on its strength to give us like a soldier in our time with need. I think that's very metaphorical resonant.
JS: Cool shit.
ES: Exactly. So, there's a lot of stuff that comes out of this and like it's pretty cool that like the idea of creation is like pulling directly from – this idea of creating like another thing is pulling me directly from the Creation myth.
AM: Yeah.
ES: Yeah.
AM: Beautiful.
JS: Love it.
AM: Thank you so much, Eric.
ES: Yeah, and that's my story about a large monster who saved the Jews.
JS: Yehey.
AM: Cool. Blood libel, not a thing.
ES: Definitely, not a thing.
AM: Interest, still kind of morally ambiguous. Hagrid and Hodor, lovely Golems.
ES: It's good. So, do I – is there like a rating system for like your guests?
JS: No. No. No.
AM: You can start one now.
ES: That's good. All right. I would give myself, for a drunkenness, definitely a solid four.
AM: Okay.
ES: Because it's salty in my mouth.
AM: Yeah.
ES: But, for-for the horrors scale, I would give myself a solid seven.
AM: Yes.
ES: The Golem didn't murder anybody, but there was a desecrated baby corpse.
AM: Yes. Seven out of 10 dead --
JS: What?
AM: Seven out of 10, dead babies
ES: Seven out of 10 dead babies. Exactly. It's a good scale.
JS: I think – I think it’s a solid 6 on the kind of creepy kind of cool scale.
AM: Yes.
ES: That's good.
AM: Yes.
JS: That is our – that is our go-to scale.
AM: I'd give it an eight out of 10 on metaphorical resonance.
JS: Nice.
ES: That's fair. And there were no women in this one. So, I'm going to give it a zero on the Bechdel test.
JS: On the Bechdel test.
AM: That's okay.
JS: That's fine.
AM: That's okay.
ES: That's a good scale.
AM: Yes. I like it. I like it.
JS: We ourselves did pass the Bechdel test though. So, that's a plus.
AM: Right. Just our, our people in the room.
JS: Just our being here.
AM: Yes.
ES: That's fair. Unless you were mentally objectifying the Golem the entire time.
JS: I was.
AM: No women got objectified in the making of this podcast.
JS: Only the Golem.
ES: No monster – no monsters were objectified.
AM: Is he naked? Does he wear clothes?
ES: Oh, yeah. He's totally naked the entire time.
AM: Oh, yeah.
ES: So, like there's a whole thing about putting clothes on it.
AM: Is there – is there like – is there like --
JS: It’s a naked dude running around there?
AM: Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Is it like a Ken doll bulge or is there like a golem schlong?
JS: Plus, you – I mean like they had a story where they specifically had to make him fingers. So, I assume that like the dick came in with the fingers.
AM: Maybe that's what they were doing instead of making the fingers.
JS: They were like oddly specific about that and be like, "Make sure he doesn't have a foreskin."
AM: Or like, we only have no meat – does or doesn't?
JS: Doesn't.
AM: Doesn't. Doesn't.
JS: Is it doesn't?
AM: Doesn't. Doesn't.
ES: I'm gonna go ahead and say that there was no Golem schlong.
JS: Oh, man!
ES: Because something tells me that three devout like, rabbinic, like the --
AM: Students. Yeah.
ES: -- best rabbi in all of Prague, hos best student, and the rabbi's like son-in-law, they're not going to be concerned about having it having like a real Pen-
JS: They're probably focused on like the survival of their community.
ES: Exactly. And they're like, "I don't want to put Pen on this. I just care about the mud."
AM: Okay.
ES: Also --
JS: I think a good dick is a mitzvah. So --
AM: Oh, no!
JS: I just had to throw that in there.
AM: Ugh!
JS: I’m sorry.
ES: Oh, no.
JS: And we’re done.
Outro Music
AM: Spirits was created by Julia Schifini and, me, Amanda McLoughlin. It's edited by Eric Schneider with music by Kevin MacLeod and visual design by Allyson Wakeman.
JS: Subscribe to Spirits on your preferred podcast app to make sure you never miss an episode. You can find us on Twitter, Facebook, and Tumblr @SpiritsPodcast.
AM: On our Patreon page, patreon.com/spiritspodcast, you can sign up for exclusive content like behind the scenes photos, audio, extras, director's commentary, blooper reels and beautiful recipe cards with custom drink and snack pairings.
JS: If you like the show, please share with your friends and leave us a review on iTunes. It really does help.
AM: Thank you so much for listening, ‘til next time.
Transcriptionist:
Rachelle Bacharo
Editor:
Krizia Marrie Casil