Episode 412: Your Urban Legends 100!!! - Out Clubbing During a Haunting

100 spooky urban legends episodes. Who would have thought? We celebrate that number with the coolest cryptid mom ever, the worst building material ever, and GHOSTLY VIDEO EVIDENCE!


Content Warning: This episode contains conversations about or mentions of animal/pet death, human death, racism, sexual harassment, hospitalization, injury, and burns. 


Housekeeping

- Recommendation: This week, Amanda recommends CALLING US at +1-617-420-3244 ! And! Lavender House by Lev AC Rosen

- Books: Check out our previous book recommendations, guests’ books, and more at https://spiritspodcast.com/books

- Call to Action: Check out Pale Blue Pod!


Sponsors

- United by Blue, creators of sustainable apparel and outdoor gear. Use the code we share in the midroll for 20% off at https://unitedbyblue.com

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Find Us Online

- Website & Transcripts: https://spiritspodcast.com

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- Goodreads: https://goodreads.com/group/show/205387


Cast & Crew

- Co-Hosts: Julia Schifini and Amanda McLoughlin

- Editor: Bren Frederick

- Music: Brandon Grugle, based on "Danger Storm" by Kevin MacLeod

- Artwork: Allyson Wakeman

- Multitude: https://multitude.productions


About Us

Spirits is a boozy podcast about mythology, legends, and folklore. Every episode, co-hosts Julia and Amanda mix a drink and discuss a new story or character from a wide range of places, eras, and cultures. Learn brand-new stories and enjoy retellings of your favorite myths, served over ice every week, on Spirits.


Transcript

[theme]

AMANDA:  Welcome to Spirits Podcast, a boozy dive into mythology, legends and folklore. Every week, we pour a drink and learn about a new story from around the world. I'm Amanda.

JULIA:  And I'm Julia. And Amanda, we've done 100 of these goddamn episodes.

AMANDA:  Hooray!

JULIA:  Hooray!

AMANDA:  100 episodes!

JULIA:  Not a bad thing. Just incredible how the way time works.

AMANDA:  The craziest part of that is most of the time, we do one a month. And so thinking about 100 months of Spirits with you is somehow even more incredible than thinking about eight years of Spirits with you, which I have wrapped my head around.

JULIA:  Yeah, it still throws me off every time we talk about how long we've been doing this and how many episodes we've put out.

AMANDA:  Uh-hmm.

JULIA:  And now, how many urban legends episodes we've done. I try to, like, console myself a little by saying there had been several months where we did multiples or, like, a full month of urban legends, but—

AMANDA:  We have.

JULIA:  —I think if you count also the bonus urban legends that we have put out, it's even more than that, which is even more wild.

AMANDA:  And Julia, I don't know about you but, like, I'm not satisfied. I need more.

JULIA:  Yeah.

AMANDA: I need more urban legends, and we're gonna bring them to you today, om, nom, nom, deliciously—

JULIA:  Om, nom, nom.

AMANDA:  —just in time for Halloween, which I love.

JULIA:  Yes, it's the day before Halloween if you're listening to this, when the episode comes out and we want to send you off into the proper holiday, properly spookied.

AMANDA:  Exactly. It's All Hallows Eve Eve, and I can think of no better way to do that than roughly an hour of urban legends.

JULIA:  Let's do it. Amanda, I actually have a email that is from a former writer in and also has video evidence.

AMANDA:  Video evidence? Let's go.

JULIA:  This starts with, "Hey, guys, it's Rose, they/them, from the haunted plush story." Now, do you remember the haunted plush story, Amanda?

AMANDA:  Ah. How can I forget?

JULIA:  Terrifying. I hate it. The idea of this thing moving on its own, horrifying, and I don't like it. But Rose—

AMANDA:  Yep.

JULIA:  —thank you for telling us in the first place. It was great.

AMANDA:  Rose, you're the best, and I hate your story.

JULIA:  Uh-hmm. So Rose says, "I have a video that was caught on my grandparents' she shed camera."

AMANDA:  Incredible.

JULIA:  "Oddly enough, it's my maternal grandpa who owns the she shed, which was the same side of the family that the haunted plush incident happened to."

AMANDA:  Okay. I'm hearing that this branch has some hauntings.

JULIA:  Might be particularly haunted, might be blood curse. You never know.

AMANDA:  Uh-hmm.

JULIA:  We love a potential blood curse on this show. "So there is several old trading trails that run through my grandparents' yard. I don't know if they're actually trading trails, but I'm going to call them that. There's one main one that runs across the driveway, pictures attached, and a couple that run into the woods behind the house as well. We also have a pet cemetery in the yard as well."

AMANDA:  Regular. I think people do, but makes me nervous.

JULIA:  I think it makes it wor— like, yes, people bury their pets in their yards, because sometimes that is much cheaper than disposing of remains via a veterinary service or something like that. The fact that you're drawing attention to it, and it's a full pet cemetery, makes it spookier. And it's not just because Stephen King wrote about it.

AMANDA:  It's spooky, and like many spooky things, you know, like a haunted old doll or a house that looks like a witch's house, I understand why you love it. It can also spook the heck out of me.

JULIA:  Yes, yes. I think we recently asked in a episode, Amanda, what's the worst feature that a house can come with? Because we were talking about a covered up well in someone's basement, like a sealed up well in someone's basement.

AMANDA:  Oh, yeah. No, that's it. That's the worst one.

JULIA:  That's pretty bad. But I also think advertising a pet cemetery in your listing on Zillow would maybe not get the results you're hoping for.

AMANDA:  I mean, what do you do? Do you add to it, you know?

JULIA:  I mean, you probably have to.

AMANDA:  Would it be more— I mean, go with me. This is not a joke. Is it— would it be better to honor and steward the pet cemetery as it was, or give them friends? Not that you make pets need a cemetery, but if it so happens that you need to lay a pet to rest, is it nice to add to the collection? The more I say this, the more I'm very, obviously, the answer is no.

JULIA:  You keep— just— you're digging the hole for the pet cemetery for yourself there, Amanda.

AMANDA:  Yep. Nope. You'll leave it alone and plant some shrubs around it, and never go in there.

JULIA:  Yes. Okay, good. Where you honor it, you don't destroy it, but also you don't add to it.

AMANDA:  Don't fucking go in there, no.

JULIA:  Something creepy about that. You start your own for your own pets if you need to, but you don't add to someone else's pet cemetery. I don't know.

AMANDA:  Yeah. I feel, like, far away so you sort of don't add to, like, the psychic energy of the same place.

JULIA:  Yeah, yeah. Opposite sides of your plot. Yeah.

AMANDA:  Like, a trust Julia, it has to, like, be equally weighted on both sides.

JULIA:  Uh-hmm. Uh-hmm. That makes sense. I've definitely taken business classes before, and I know exactly what you mean. "On the evening of Thursday, March 7th, hate exact days, I was in my room decompressing from another day at high school when my grandfather yelled for me to come look at something. When I found him in the den, he had a video from the blink camera that was set up in the she shed. The clip is attached." Amanda, now I've added the clip to our Slack channel, and I said, "Don't watch this until you are ready."

AMANDA:  That's right, and I have it queued up.

JULIA:  All right.

AMANDA:  Do I press go now?

JULIA:  Yes.

AMANDA:  Okay. So I'm very clearly seeing a extremely defined orb of light move from the bottom of the frame to the top. That's no reflection, Julia. That is a clear bulb of light.

JULIA:  Not a dust mote yet either, you know?

AMANDA:  Oh, yeah, no. It would— it's not falling down. It's clearly going up.

JULIA:  So Rose continues, "After he showed me the clip, he switched over to the live feed from that camera, and we sat for at least five minutes watching orbs similar to the one in the video dance around the room until my grandma called. He told her to check the live feeds, and she said she didn't see anything unusual. He went back and checked the feed, and the orbs we had watched dance around were gone." So I have a few theories as to what was on this video. Amanda, would you like to posit some theories before we go into Rose's theories?

AMANDA:  Yes. So first would be, is this somehow a, like, broken or drifting pixel in the camera?

JULIA:  Hmm.

AMANDA:  Again, I've not seen it react that way, but, like, I can't, you know, discount the idea that maybe there's something malfunctioning with the tech, in a way that looks—

JULIA:  Uh-hmm.

AMANDA:  —extremely fucking spooky.

JULIA:  Yes, it— yeah.

AMANDA:  Second would be, I don't know, like a bug that has the most direct and well sailing path I've ever seen.

JULIA:  No legs and no wings that are visible for the camera.

AMANDA:  No. Or then third, it's some kind of reflection, reflecting off something, a— I don't know. Something like refracting in through a window and catching the camera in a weird way. There is a window visible through the, like, lens that we are looking at. So just some kind of, like, odd reflection is my best guess.

JULIA:  Yes. Now, Rose has included this video. I definitely want to post it on our Instagram or something like that, so other people can share their theories. But here are Rose's theories. "Number one, accidents, with or without quotation marks, that happen on the trading trails. The trails are probably really old. There were probably a few deaths that happened along the trail, and maybe there are a few unmarked graves along the trails." Who can say?

AMANDA:  Certainly possible.

JULIA:  "Theory number two, crossroads theory. Crossroads are always a place of spirits, so maybe the spirits are attracted to the crossroads." And you'll remember that Rose specifies that along the driveway, there's also a trail that crosses there. So it's very possible that this is like a crossroads—

AMANDA:  Uh-hmm.

JULIA:  —situation. And they are very right in saying that crossroads are usually a place that spirits congregate.

AMANDA:  You've got energy building up, and accidents are bound to happen, interceptions.

JULIA:  Yes. Yeah. "And then finally, theory three, the pet cemetery."

AMANDA:  Yep.

JULIA:  "Now, I should mention that it's not really a cemetery, per se. It's more of an area in an area which family pets are buried once they die. Over the years, two generations of my family have lived on the property, so it's only natural that there have been a lot of family pets buried in the cemetery. At least four dogs and a cat have been buried there since my parents and I moved back to the state in 2014. So maybe it's just some of our old pets playing around."

AMANDA:  I like that the best. I don't know what kind of pet. Oh, okay. Maybe the cat that is at rest in the pet cemetery has—

JULIA:  Hmm.

AMANDA:  —rigged up some kind of game for itself, because I have never seen a spiritual entity that a cat would more want to play with than an orb slowly rising out of frame.

JULIA:  Yes, I agree. That is very cat-friendly and cat— I was gonna say cat safe, but that's not exactly what I'm saying, because also that cat is a spirit now. So even if it isn't cat safe, the cat's probably fine.

AMANDA:  Uh-hmm.

JULIA:  And then Rose is nice enough to share a couple of photos of current pets, Amanda, if you would like to see those. I'll drop them in our chat here.

AMANDA:  Hell yes. Thank you, Rose.

JULIA:  One, those are two very cute dogs wrestling over a stick. And then another very cute boy just hanging out on his back there.

AMANDA:  Oh, yeah. Oh, very good.

JULIA:  Those are good boys.

AMANDA:  Very good. Oh, yeah. Love the tummy scratch, and then the paw up in the face.

JULIA:  He's like, "Oh, don't stop."

AMANDA:  So, Julia, that was a really wonderful, I would say, mildly spooky occurrence. S

JULIA:  Uh-hmm.

AMANDA:  I am going to follow that up with a, you know, mildly spooky into wholesome urban legend series.

JULIA:  Okay.

AMANDA:  And then we'll get into, I think, the really spooky shit in the back half.

JULIA:  Yeah. I have a good spooky one for the back half as well. Don't fucking worry.

AMANDA:  So this email came in on your birthday, so I thought it was particularly relevant. And Phia, she/her, writes in, "Here are three wholesome stories from Brisbane, Australia. American translations included.

JULIA:  Yay. Thank you.

AMANDA:  So Phia starts, "My Ma has always been a bit of a legend to me. As a teen, she ran away from a highly religious family with an Aboriginal man, unthinkable in Australia in the 80's."

JULIA:  Yeah.

AMANDA:  "Worked for more charities than I can name, and almost married a friend so he didn't have to return to his war-torn country."

JULIA:  That's so nice. I love her.

AMANDA:  "She's the type of person to give someone the shirt off her back, because, quote, 'It's fine. I'm wearing my swimsuit underneath.' So maybe what follows shouldn't be surprising. Story one, Keep everyone in the loop, please. We moved often growing up, very spiritual and nomadic, and I begged my mom to stay in one place for me to do all the years of high school with my cousin. So we rented an old wooden white Queenslander. For those of you not Aussie, it's a workers' house from when we were farmers and sheep shearers, nothing fancy, high ceilings, a couple fans, no insulation, and you can see through the tiny gaps in the floorboards. They often have big decks as well."

JULIA:  Okay. That sounds spooky for a land with a lot of spiders and a lot of snakes, but okay.

AMANDA:  It does. But it's very like, you know, workers' housing, or like transient or, you know, three seasons, not necessarily insulated for a winter time.

JULIA:  Got you.

AMANDA:  So I appreciate the translation. "We loved this house. While we saved for curtains, we hung up sarongs over the windows, bathing the house in colors or bluetacked printed poems to the glass for privacy. It was eclectic, mismatched, and quirky. We filled it with our Mob and friends often having sleepovers on the floor in front of the TV, as Ma slept on the sofa above. The kids nicknamed her Mother Goose, and so did the spirit."

JULIA:  Oh, okay. I was gonna say, before we got to the ghost stuff, I was like, "Wow. We're really, like, living the dream." Like this— I think this is a lot of people's, like, dream of like, "I'm just gonna, like, live in the country and be like an eclectic grandma," and that sort of thing. Usually minus ghosts, but given our listeners, maybe plus ghosts. I don't know.

AMANDA:  I don't know, either. I'm also— I'm feeling a lot of like, you know, you don't necessarily have a ton of money, but you have a ton of, like, care and coziness, and I think that's so wonderful.

JULIA:  That's what it's all about, baby.

AMANDA:  So Phia continues, "Oh, did I not mention Him yet?" And it's a capital H, as I hope you can hear in my voice.

JULIA:  Of course.

AMANDA:  "HE loved the house, too. Every night around 11:00 pm, He would walk through the front door, down the long center hallway, peeking into rooms, checking if the kids were in bed, nod to my Ma in front of the TV and sit out on the back deck with a heavy sigh."

JULIA:   Big no from Julia over here in the corner.

AMANDA:  "The kind of sigh only really exists after settling your weary bones down after a day of labor. Remember that shirt anecdote I said before? Ma also took in kids at night that couldn't or wouldn't go home. Her only rule is you to tell your parents where you were and promise to go home the next day. So we often had a few teens in the house sleeping off hangovers or getting some space from their parents after arguments. One night, Ma went out on the town. While out, she got a call from a distressed cousin who asked if she and two others could stay. Ma said, 'Of course, Help yourselves.' She'd be back around 1:00 pm. So the two girls and a boy let themselves in, grabbed some snacks, popped on a movie, and 11:00 pm rolled on by. HE walked in the front door, passed the teens in front of the TV. Why not? They visit often. He checks the empty rooms, the back deck, and then, for the first time, he turned around, came back into the living room and quietly said, 'Where's Mother?'"

JULIA:  Oh, fuck that. It's bad enough that, you know— okay. You have a ghost, number one bad thing. But the ghost isn't doing any harm. Ghost has a routine.

AMANDA:  Ideal.

JULIA:  But, you know—

AMANDA:  If we've accepted you have a ghost, okay, we move on, and say it's something you get used to. It's predictable. You can stay out of its way. It can stay out of your way. You know what's happening.

JULIA:  But when the— the predictability changes, Amanda, that's where we get fucked up here. And then—

AMANDA:  Yep.

JULIA:  —it speaks for the first time, absolutely fucking not.

AMANDA:  "The girls froze, don't look at him. The drunk boy continues fighting with his girlfriend via text. And then HE asks again louder, 'Where is Mother?'"

JULIA:  Uh-hmm. The mother makes it works, too.

AMANDA:  I know it's just old-timey and not about like drag queens, but I am just picturing drag queens, like I have to.

JULIA:  I'm picturing Mike Pence calling his wife mother.

AMANDA:  Oh, no. No. Ugh. Jump Scare. "The girls continue to ignore him. They're firmly team ignorant, but the drunk boy replies, 'She out, man, off dancing and whatnot.' And keeps—"

JULIA:  "She out, man. She loves dancing.

AMANDA:  "Keeps stuffing his face while texting. HE didn't like this response, and the chip—"

JULIA:  Rude.

AMANDA:  "—bag goes flying across the room." It's a real like, "Look at me when you speak to me," type energy.

JULIA:  Uh-hmm. Uh-hmm. We already know, very formal, this ghost, very respectful.

AMANDA:  Formal, respectful, probably old-timey as a laborer who lived in this house before this family came in.

JULIA:  Uh-hmm. And now that this child is being disrespectful, shit's gonna hit the floor.

AMANDA:  Uh-hmm.  "The old creaky wooden door and windows start opening and closing as he gets more annoyed."

JULIA:  No.

AMANDA:  "From his perspective, the teens took her food, made a mess, and now they're being disrespectful?"

JULIA:  Fucking rude.

AMANDA:  "Ma is still out on the town when her phone rings, she had to step out of the club—" I love that she's in a club. I love that she's in a club. Great.

JULIA:  I don't know if I'm going to be a parent in the future, but if I am, this is the vibe I want.

AMANDA:  I love that she's like, "You know what? Everyone's safe and fine. You know the rules. Come on in and out of the house as you wish. I'm gonna be at the club and I will be back tomorrow."

JULIA:  Uh-hmm.

AMANDA:  "So in an alley outside the club, she answered her phone and heard from cousin, everyone was so upset. Quote, 'We're all sitting on the front lawn with a knife, and everything keeps moving, windows, doors, lights. I don't think He likes us being here without you.'"

JULIA:  I like that their, like, instinct, grab a knife.

AMANDA:  Grab a knife. Sit on the lawn. I mean, it can't— it could hurt. I was gonna say can't hurt. No, it can.

JULIA:  It could, it could.

AMANDA:  "Ma laughed and asked to be put on loudspeaker." Just, again, Julia, picture her in, like, her club finery in the loudspeak— in an alley on speaker, "Hi, it's me. The little kids are at a sleepover. The teens are at youth group. I'll be home soon. Could you watch over this lot for me, please? Did you guys respect the rule?' The teens pull up the texts and hold them toward the house shouting,  "YES!" to the phone." Again, the rule being they told their parents where they were and they're gonna go home the next day.

JULIA:  Right, right, right.

AMANDA:  "Then all the windows stopped moving, the doors and lights and TV stilled. Ma called out a thank you and went to get her purse and hail a cab. She said HE had left by the time she got home and found the teens still on the front lawn. They didn't appreciate her laughter, but they did take notes on her impromptu, 'How to protect herself from outside forces' lecture."

JULIA:  Hmm.

AMANDA:  "Still, they never entered the house again unless Ma or I were home."

JULIA:  Checks out. I also— just the energy of this woman, I wouldn't be surprised if she, like, pulled a prank that involved, like, you know, using a smartphone to set the lights to flicker on and off or something like that. But the door is opening and closing, that's some tech, you know?

AMANDA:  And the window shutters too, especially just picturing this as, like, you know, a house that has been, like, lovingly tended to, but doesn't have any frills. That's a lot.

JULIA:  That's spooky. Not a fan, but love this woman. Love this energy, love Ma.

AMANDA:  Love her. Do you want the second story, Julia?

JULIA:  Oh, is it from the same person, too?

AMANDA:  Oh, we have three.

JULIA:  Oh, fuck yeah. Fuck me up. Let's go.

AMANDA:  Story two is called excuse me, young lady.

JULIA:  Hmm. Again, a very polite ghost, I'm assuming.

AMANDA:  "HE only talked to me once."

JULIA:  Uh-hmm.

AMANDA:  "I came home from youth group to find a cousin asleep in the bottom of my bunk bed in a pair of my pajamas."

JULIA:  Nice.

AMANDA:  "Being the temperamental 14-year-old I was, sorry, Ma, I started to whisper yell at her what I said I honestly can't remember, but I'll never forget what HE said in return."

JULIA:  Hmm.

AMANDA:  "As my Ma and I were whisper fighting in the hallway, my cousin sleeping in my bed, the clock turned to 11:00 pm. HE arrived like clockwork, checking the rooms, and HE came down the hallway and stepped up to us. 'Enough." A tired masculine voice said, "You don't speak to Mother that way. To bed with you, young lady."

JULIA:  This— it has the energy of a exhausted former worker who's getting home late, sees that the kids are still up and also fighting with their mother and says, "Get the fuck to sleep, bitches. Get the fuck to sleep. I worked in the mines all day."

AMANDA:  "You don't pay rent. You don't have a job."

JULIA:  "Go to sleep."

AMANDA:  "I was so shocked that I did, in fact, stop. HE hadn't said it in anger, hadn't raised his voice. It was resigned and weary. Ma looked mildly amused and made an, "Off you go," hand gesture. As I walked to my room, grumbling, HE followed, watching me as I climbed up onto the top bunk, and HE let out a tired chuckle and told me to sleep. I lay in bed questioning what the hell had just happened to me. I heard Ma through the walls as she went and sat out on the back deck with him, talking quietly."

JULIA:  I also— what I really like and appreciate about this story is they never describe him.

AMANDA:  Yes.

JULIA:  I can't picture if it's a shadow figure. I can't picture if it's a, like, fully formed, like apparition. I just— I don't know what I'm picturing here, and that makes it scarier.

AMANDA:  I think it's an incredible literary device not to describe the figure. I'm almost picturing like a presence you can feel, maybe even see, like, a shimmer of an outline, but nothing else. And I'm honestly actually getting some, like, ghost romance vibes.

JULIA:  Hmm.

AMANDA:  Now, paranormal romance is not my trope, but I highly respect it. And, in fact, I didn't want to, like, bring it up, because this is like Phia's mom we're talking about. But Phia does say, "Now that I'm older, I'm glad my single Ma had that kind of older spirit looking out for her."

JULIA:  Hmm.

AMANDA:  "She's mentioned a few sexual harassment moments throughout her life, how when guys were helping her out mowing, cleaning gutters, et cetera. They may try to hit on her or take advantage of a vulnerable woman home alone."

JULIA:  Hmm.

AMANDA:  "But they never followed her into the house, always staying on the back deck. She felt so safe closing those glass doors behind her, as if they had the strength of solid stone."

JULIA:  Hmm.

AMANDA:  "Sadly, at some point, the owner of the house decided to renovate it, and we left. We moved a few times since I finished high school, but no house has felt as much of a home as that one."

JULIA:  Yeah, because it has your friend, it's got your buddy there.

AMANDA:  And now, story number three is titled that urban legend sounds like my Ma?

JULIA:  Uh-oh. Which one?

AMANDA:  "When not doing charity, helping youth, or being my single Ma, she was off being spooky."

JULIA:  Hell yeah.

AMANDA:  "We have a graveyard in our suburb. Now, down past it through a tiny forest, you'll reach the 24-hour highway Maccas stop." This is, of course, Julia, Australian for McDonald's."

JULIA:  Ah, of course. Naturally.

AMANDA:  "We would wander down at night, and Ma would always lag behind, chatting with the ghost, telling the Anzac boys the rugby score, annoying the nuns, and greeting the occasional newbie."

JULIA:  I love her so much.

AMANDA:  Right? "Ma was very good at chatting and then leaving them behind. We never had anything follow us home. Now being grown, I understand how impressive that is. It was a common walk from us teens, the 2:00 am Maccas run, to soak up vodka and Heineken, whatever we'd been drinking with our friends."

JULIA:  Just keep laughing at Maccas. That's so funny.

AMANDA:  "I've been told I look like my Ma. I don't really see it myself, but some spirits think so, too. So I would firmly say, 'I'm not Mother Goose, but she will see you soon.' And keep walking slightly faster this time, making no eye contact. It's a habit a few of my friends copied in a more outrageous kind of jokey, exaggerated way as we passed the graveyard. Just teens taking the piss out of each other. So imagine my surprise when I visited that suburb 10 years later, a friend having bought a house a street over from where I used to live. As the neighbors were saying hi, one of their kids tried to scare us by telling us how the street is haunted and how a little ghost girl would ride her trike down the hill at night."

JULIA:  Okay.

AMANDA:  I don't know why I'm so charmed by the idea of a ghost tricycle. I don't know why. It's so cute.

JULIA:  No, it's pretty good.

AMANDA:  "Before they had nearly finished their story, the older kids scoffed and said, 'Everyone knows, you can just scare her off by saying Mother will see you soon.' I broke out in goosebumps."

JULIA:  Hmm.

AMANDA:  "The Little Ghost Girl was an old urban legend for the suburb, but the ending was new, so I asked, 'Wait, who's Mother?' The kid shrugged bored already leaving, 'Mother keeps you safe so you can get home, you know?' I still haven't gathered the courage to tell Ma she may be an urban legend. I don't want her to feel responsible for her old ghost friends and visit."

JULIA:  Amanda, we asked this question a couple episodes ago of, what urban legend will we want to be about us?

AMANDA:  Uh-hmm.

JULIA:  And I think that's that one. It's that.

AMANDA:  This might be it.

JULIA:  I want it. I want it in my life. I want to be, like, so cool that the kids are like, "Oh, yeah. You just have to, like, talk to mother and then, like, you know, she'll protect you when she gets home."

AMANDA:  Amazing. Phia, your mom sounds like a fucking trip. I love her. I love your stories. Thank you for writing in. And I would love some kind of note from Ma. If you want to do a voice memo, if you want to chat with her, get her take on some of the stuff she's working with, I want nothing more.

JULIA:  And Amanda, speaking of sending us voice memos, I hear you have something in the works that might be ready now for this episode.

AMANDA:  I do, indeed. So thinking about how we're going to level up urban legends, how do we do even better than we've done in the first 100 episodes? I think we're gonna need your voices on the show. So we have created a Google voice number, you can call into 617-420, Blaze, 2344. That's 617-420-2344. We'll put the number in the episode description as well, and leave us a voice memo. Keep it short, keep it, you know, under a minute, and let us know if you have a question, a story, a prompt, a headcanon, and we'll put it on the show, people.

JULIA:  I dare us.

AMANDA:  I'm so excited. So only Phia and I would say Ma Winchester are allowed to call in with longer calls, but yeah, keep it around a minute. Do— you know, have it as quiet in the background as you possibly can, and I am so excited to hear your voices and make them part of the show.

JULIA:  Oh, Amanda, it's gonna be so much fun.

AMANDA:  It's gonna be so much fun.

JULIA:  I need to tamper down my excitement for this. Why don't we quickly go grab our refill?

AMANDA:  Let's do it.

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AMANDA:  Hello, everybody. It's Amanda, and welcome to the refill, where, first and foremost, I have to thank our newest patrons, Marley and Denise. Thank you so, so much for supporting us on Patreon and getting things like a new bonus urban legends episode every dang month. This month comes out on Halloween. I mean, come on, how can you not? If you want to join Marley and Denise, go to patreon.com/spiritspodcast where you get not only the new rewards that we post all the time for patrons, but the years and years of back catalog rewards. We've been on Patreon since 2016, there's a lot to enjoy, folks. Thanks as well to our supporting producer-level patrons, Uhleeseeuh, Anne, Hannah, Jane, Lily, Matthew, Captain Jonathan MAL-uh-kye Cosmos, Sarah, and Scott. And our legend-level patrons, Audra, Bex, Chibi Yokai, Michael, Morgan H., Sarah, and Bea Me Up Scotty. Now, we're going to share this with you at the end of the episode, but a very special phone number is in the description of this episode, so I highly recommend that you check it out. Now, I have gotten extremely deep into a new book series recently that I have a feeling all of you are highly going to enjoy. It's the Lavender House trilogy by Lev AC Rosen. This is a historical mystery set in San Francisco in the 50's, and features a ton of found family, queer people and historically accurate details. If, like me, you are somebody who really appreciates seeing images of our queers elves in the past, aka, a large number of you here on Spirits, then you are really going to enjoy Lavender House. It's a fabulous job. I love the writing. I love the plotting. It has beautiful imagery, and it's the first of three books, all of which are out, so you can complete that whole trilogy now. The link to Lavender House and all of the books we've ever recommended on Spirits are at spiritspodcast.com/books. Lots going down at Multitude, which you love to hear including— it is a wonderful time as the days are getting shorter and night is starting sooner. To check out a little bit about our universe, you should go ahead and look at Pale Blue Pod, an astronomy podcast for people who are overwhelmed by the universe but want to be its friend, where astrophysicist Dr. Moiya McTier demystifies space one topic at the time. Long-time co-host Corinne Caputo has departed the show after 100 episodes. We love you, Corinne. So now, Dr. McTier is interviewing a bunch of fantastic guest experts as she searches for an irreplaceable person to fill the very big shoes that Corinne left behind. So go on ahead, listen to Pale Blue Pod in your podcast app now, or go to palebluepod.space. We are sponsored this week by United By Blue, a sustainable lifestyle brand that prioritizes sustainable materials and ethical manufacturing, to lead the charge toward better business practices overall. For every product purchased, they remove one pound of trash from oceans and waterways. Get it? That's why it's blue. Like we're united by the blue of the ocean. And that has resulted in over 3.5 million pounds so far. I absolutely love the hiking day pack I got from United By Blue, which is stylish and cute, and I'm pretty sure Mischa has a matching one. Almost all of us at Multitude, we're like, "Can I have every freebie of all time?" Because United By Blue's stuff is just that nice. But the best thing is they make stuff that will be with you for a long time. I have a insulated, like, half growler bottle that I got from them, probably four years ago, that I use on every car trip. It's perfect to just have, like, a good, you know, 32 ounces of water with ice in the car that's going to stay cold no matter what I'm doing. And they use all kinds of great stuff, like non-toxic regenerative fibers and recycled fabrics. So go on over to unitedbyblue.com and use the code Spirits to get 20% off your order. That's unitedbyblue.com and the code is Spirits. Spirits is sponsored this week by BetterHelp. Now, of course, we talk a lot about spooky stuff here on the show, and one of the things that I think I appreciate most about horror and spooky season and, you know, dressing up for Halloween, it's a playful way to face our fears, right? It's a way to look into the abyss of death or whatever, and be like, "No, that's just my neighbor with skull makeup on." So something that I hope resonates with you, if that message does, is that it's also really useful to face your fears personally. Therapy is a really useful tool to do that. I'm going to therapy right after I record this midroll. Therapy is great and a very, very useful tool for me. I really appreciate that if you cannot affordably or safely access therapy where you are right now and you are looking for a convenient, online, flexible solution, let BetterHelp be an option for you. All you have to do is fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist, and you can switch therapists at any time for no additional charge. So overcome your fears with BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/spirits today to get 10% off your first month. That's betterhelp, H-E-L-P, .com/spirits. And now, let's get back to the show.

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JULIA:  Amanda, we are back. And hey, what have you been enjoying, cocktail, mocktail, beer-wise, wine-wise? What's been going on?

AMANDA:  One of the very first things that my husband Eric made for me was Mulled apple cider, and it is finally cool enough to do that at home. So we have been combining some Mulled apple cider with, like, a little bit of whatever I've been baking on the side. I've been finally keeping a sourdough starter, and so I've been doing some, like, sour dough scones and muffins, which I am so stoked about. And, of course, dosing it with a little bit of whiskey.

JULIA:  Of course. Naturally. You gotta, you gotta. I have been absolutely craving— I went last year around Halloween time. But there is a tiki bar in New York City called Tiki Chick that has an incredible spooky, like, Halloween takeover that they do every year. And I have been absolutely craving this cocktail that I had from them last year called The Practical Magic.

AMANDA:  Hmm.

JULIA:  It is a frozen cocktail. It is like spiced rum. It's got a little bit of, like, all spice in there. It's got pumpkin puree. It's got a little citrus and a little cinnamon, and something that I've never seen at any other place, a Pepita seed orgeat, which is—

AMANDA:  Ooh.

JULIA:  —like— usually that's made with— it's like an almond syrup.

AMANDA:  Yeah.

JULIA:  But the Pepita seed is, like, so kind of toastier and so— like, pumpkin-y. It pairs so well with the pumpkin puree. It's—

AMANDA:  Oh, my God.

JULIA:  —incredible. If you're in Manhattan, before Halloween season is over, go to Tiki Chick and have a little cocktail.

AMANDA:  Today, today.

JULIA:  Today, during— or tomorrow. They'll probably be open on Halloween. Who knows?

AMANDA:  So good.

JULIA:  Oh, incredible. Well, Amanda, I have a story for you. I think it's pretty creepy. It's from Madison. It is titled my nana's— or rather, my nana's hospital visitor.

AMANDA:  Okay.

JULIA:  Now, a little bit of content warning at the top. It deals with— you know, as people get a little bit older and not being able to take care of themselves as much, and also, like, hospitalization and stuff like that. So if that's a personal or, like, you know, particularly emotional topic for you, I would skip this. But I do think it is a fascinating little story, and I think you will be as surprised as I was by it, Amanda.

AMANDA:  Okay. I'm ready.

JULIA:  Madison writes, "I'm a new listener, slowly making my way through your back catalog. Absolutely love the show, especially learning different cultures' beliefs. This isn't so much my hometown urban legend, more so a family experience that we still refer to. When I was in sixth grade, I'm 29 now as I write this, my nana, which we pronounce like Nana instead of nana, my mom's mom, fell down her house's basement stairs. This wasn't the first time she had done so, but she particularly hurt herself this time, and we realized that it was becoming a little bit too dangerous for her to remain in this house alone. She ended up breaking some bones in her hand, arm, wrist area. It's been so long, so I've kind of—"

AMANDA:  Hmm.

JULIA:  "—forgotten what she actually broke, and it really shook her up. My Nana and I were very close. She watched me during the week while my parents were at work, and she was one of my favorite people. Everyone in the family adored her as well, but as I was the youngest, this hit me the hardest, especially because while in the hospital, she was a different person, and that scared me."

AMANDA:  Yeah, totally.

JULIA:  "One day, my aunt and my mom went to visit my Nana in the hospital after work. The nurse on duty said that she was doing very well and had finally eaten her lunch, which included tapioca pudding." Amanda, did you have— I haven't been hospitalized enough to have a favorite hospital food, but do you have a favorite hospital food?

AMANDA:  Definitely, Jell-O. I had a lot of hand surgeries when I was a kid, and the sort of, like, test was like, can you, you know, keep down some food before they let you leave? And it was always the red Jell-O for me. Mwa.

JULIA:  Hmm. There's something about that red Jell-O that just hits right, you know?

AMANDA:  It's good stuff.

JULIA:  "So had finally eaten her lunch, included the tapioca pudding. When she came to get the tray, my nana introduced the man that was sitting at her bedside as her son, and they chatted for a moment before the nurse left. My aunt and my mom asked for a description of the man as my dad worked over an hour away from the hospital and he wouldn't have been able to travel that far for lunch. My Uncle Bill, which is my aunt's husband, lived closer, however, he has MS, and at that point, was no longer able to drive a car, let alone get into a car by himself."

AMANDA:  Hmm.

JULIA:  "Now, the nurse described the man as having salt and pepper hair, having a nice smile, not very tall, and brilliant blue eyes. Several people in my family have a particular shade of blue eyes, more like a bright baby blue than anything."

AMANDA:  Okay. Like it's doable, but not necessarily the word you would use to describe that.

JULIA:  Yes. "Now, this man fit my Uncle Ed's description perfectly. This also fits as he was always able to get my Nana to eat something, which was something that was quite difficult 90% of the time."

AMANDA:  What— had Uncle Ed passed away?

JULIA:  Give me a second, Amanda. They also mentioned that, "Nana hated tapioca pudding, but had eaten it for her son at different events. There is only one problem with this. My uncle passed away in a car accident 10 years previously."

AMANDA:  Uh-hmm. Uh-hmm.

JULIA:  "As you can imagine, my aunt and my mom had a full-blown meltdown over this, telling the nurse—"

AMANDA:  Yes.

JULIA:  "—that their brother was dead."

AMANDA:  Yeah.

JULIA:  "The nurse, completely unfazed, said, 'This happens all the time,' and then walked off to finish her rounds.

AMANDA:  This happens all the time?

JULIA:  This happens all the time. The— you— like, the twist of like, oh, it was the ghost of the son is a good twist. It's the nurse saying, "Oh, this happens all the time," and then walking away. That really did it for me in this story.

AMANDA:  That's incredible. I love the nurse being like, "Classic."

JULIA:  "After this incident, my Nana was back to her usual self. It was the most surreal 180 I had ever seen. My aunt and my mom said it was Ed's way of checking up on her and telling her to, quote, 'get her act in gear' about her attitude at the time and to finally sell the house. The first time she had fallen, my mom and my uncle wanted her to sell, but my aunt and my Nana refused. I don't think anyone ever asked my Nana about it. Ed was a bit of a golden child, and losing him was extremely hard, especially so soon after she had lost her husband."

AMANDA:  Hmm.

JULIA:  "When my Nana passed away in 2010, there were a few instances of what I assume was her, quote-unquote, 'visiting us.' It would be small things, mostly making things look neater around the house." I love that. She's like, "It's too messy in here."

AMANDA:  She's like, "Clean this up a little bit. Clean this up a little bit. Okay, fine. Okay, fine. I'll do it."

JULIA:  "For example, my Nana had a pair of slippers she always wore in the house. When she would leave, she would make sure that they were straightened out and tucked away. She also expected them to be in the same place when she got back the next day."

AMANDA:  Yeah.

JULIA:  "On a few occasions, my slippers would end up like this. My mom even swore to me that she did not straighten them, and I have no reason why she would lie."

AMANDA:  Oh.

JULIA:  "Thanks for reading and keep up the phenomenal work."

AMANDA:  That is such a grandma thing to like— for my grandma, like she had— not even, like, perfectly folded, but just very distinctly folded blankets or, like, the hand towel in the bathroom, you know?

JULIA:  Uh-hmm.

AMANDA:  And, like, you could tell— now that I'm getting older, I'm like, "Oh, man, as kids, we must just, like, balls it up and, like, thrown it wherever." But like, you could tell when Gammy folded the blanket and when—

JULIA:  Uh-hmm.

AMANDA:  —someone else did. So I— that, like, really hits home for me, of, like, "Uh, no, no, no. These are how the slippers go. Like, I taught you better."

JULIA:  Uh-hmm. Uh-hmm. No, I love that. I think it's a very sweet story. I love this idea of the son who has passed, being like, "Come on, mom, get your shit together. Like, let's figure this out. We don't want to lose you too soon." But I also— I need to know what's going on with that nurse. I need to know if she's, like, particularly attuned to spirits or if that particular hospital is haunted. Or nurses who, you know, listen to the show, write in and tell us if you've had an experience like this and you're like, "Ah, yeah. The ghost at the bedside, happens all the time."

AMANDA:  I simply have to know. Obviously, in that profession, you deal with people in extremes all the time. You deal with people in that liminal space. And I have to imagine that you have more than a few stories. So healthcare professionals, get in our email.

JULIA:  Get in there. We've had a lot of, like, people who work as cleaners at hospitals write in before.

AMANDA:  Uh-hmm.

JULIA:  But I gotta know, healthcare professionals. Like, what's up? What's going on?

AMANDA:  Oh, yeah. No, I imagine all kinds of folks, whether in, you know, operations, sanitation, like, whatever it might be, but working in and around places where people go, when they're, you know, dealing with real serious medical stuff. Gotta be sort of adjacent to the ghosts.

JULIA:  Gotta be a little spooky. Gotta be.

AMANDA:  All right, Julia. Here is my final email for the episode from Tori, she/her, titled Basement Stair Monster, Catholic Grandmothers—

JULIA:  Hmm.

AMANDA:  —and doors in the attack?

JULIA:  Ooh. Okay. Okay. I'm interested.

AMANDA:  I thought this was a nice, like, sweep through some of our favorite tropes.

JULIA:  Yes.

AMANDA:  "Hi, Spirits. I've been collecting stories for a while now, and finally, have enough that I felt I could write in with. My first story comes from my father and his childhood. When he was a little boy, he and his cousins ran around the family farmhouse, which caused lots of trouble for my great aunt and grandma."

JULIA:  Uh-hmm.

AMANDA:   "When he and his three cousins played around the house, they never went to the basement, not just because basements are dark and creepy generally, but because of a monster they like to call Gorilla Jack."

JULIA:  Uh-oh. Uh-oh.

AMANDA:  " When I asked my dad about this so-called Gorilla Jack, and how it got its name, he simply said, 'Oh, that's what Leona calls him.'"

JULIA:  Now, who's Leona?

AMANDA:  Now, Leona is Tori's great aunt.

JULIA:  Okay. But that's also the name of the spooky lady inside the crystal ball inside haunted mansion, Amanda.

AMANDA:  Oh, really? I didn't know this.

JULIA:  It might be Leota, but still close.

AMANDA:  Similar, similar.

JULIA:  Close and scary.

AMANDA:  "Gorilla Jack, apparently, has been in my family for many generations, and even crossed over to my dad's cousin's side of the family."

JULIA:  Of course.

AMANDA:  "Now, the story goes that if you were misbehaving and made your way down to the basement, Gorilla Jack would reach through the open basement stairs and grab you by the ankles."

JULIA:  Amanda, it's you.

AMANDA:  It's me, Julia.

JULIA:  It's you. Famously, you were very scared of your basement stairs because they had no backs.

AMANDA:  You gotta have a back to your stairs, people.

JULIA:  You just gotta.

AMANDA:  I— I'm simply telling you, you gotta have a back to your stairs if you're gonna expect me or any other scared and bookish child to go down there.

JULIA:  Amanda, are you glad that we've kind of gotten away from that architectural phenomena?

AMANDA:  Now, I mean, maybe I spend a lot less time in suburban basements right now. But I mean, the other day, like two days ago, I was at our library, which has a— it's— it was, like, renovated maybe three or four years ago, and it's an Environmental Education Center, so they have, like, a huge skylight and, like, very beautiful roof deck. But, Julia, they have fucking backless glass stairs going down from the roof deck to the library.

JULIA:  That's not right.

AMANDA:  And I said, "Why?"

JULIA:  That's not right.

AMANDA:  "Why? Why?"

JULIA:  At least it's out in the open, and there's sunlight, and there's no place for the monsters to hide.

AMANDA:  Yes, but there are also toddlers climbing up those stairs all day.

JULIA:  True. True, true.

AMANDA:  Come on, come on.

JULIA:  To be against code. I'll talk to Jake about it. He'll change it first.

AMANDA:  Thank you.

JULIA:  Uh-hmm. Uh-hmm.

AMANDA:  Get that done. "So I asked my dad what the hell the story was. He said he has no idea when or how the story started, but he suspects that his great, great uncle made it up to get his grandma to go to sleep when she was a child and stop her from running down the stairs and playing in the basement, which must have been kind of dangerous."

JULIA:  This is like the grandma who told the child to go to sleep by telling her the story about how he steals fucking breath. We're just telling children lies and traumatizing—

AMANDA:  Uh-hmm.

JULIA:  —generations now.

AMANDA:  Julia, that's folklore. All right, baby.

JULIA:  Yeah. Yeah.

AMANDA:  That's why we're here.

JULIA:   Yeah.

AMANDA:  "Now, the story must have stuck and continued to be told as a warning to all kids going forward, leading eventually to us. Luckily, as kids, we never had a basement, but I was always afraid and very careful when walking down any open stairs in any basement I ever visited."

JULIA:  Yeah.

AMANDA:  I wonder why he was a gorilla.

JULIA:  No, I don't know. Maybe that— this idea of, like—

AMANDA:  Just like the long arms.

JULIA:  All I can think of is the episode of Over the Garden Wall, where they're like, "There's a wild gorilla on the loose," and then it's just like— it's a guy in a gorilla costume.

AMANDA:  Yeah.

JULIA:  And he's been stuck in there.

AMANDA:  That's fair.

JULIA:  And they're like, "Oh, it's just you. I thought you left me."

AMANDA:  "Second story comes from my very Catholic grandmother, same grandma from the previous story. She was a nurse for 40 years, and was always the one we'd go to stitch us up and heal our injuries. She would make, quote, 'special creams' and, quote, 'blow the fire'—"

JULIA:  Oh.

AMANDA:  "out of our burns." Isn't that cute?

JULIA:  That's very cute, but it also reminds me of, like, all of the, like— particularly like Latina grandmas, like the little abuelas, who, you know, were very Catholic, but also did a lot of folk medicine.

AMANDA:  Yes.

JULIA:  Big energy there.

AMANDA:  Oh, yeah. No, both and, you don't have to separate those things.

JULIA:  Uh-hmm.

AMANDA:  "Now, her creams were always stored in glass jars, and we never knew exactly what was in it. But if you put this on your wounds, she said they would never scar. Now, when I burned my palm very badly on a stove one time, she insisted I brought to her so she could blow the fire out of my hand."

JULIA:  Hmm.

AMANDA:  "She sat me down, blew gently on my palm, and as a kid, I truly believed my hand instantly stopped hurting."

JULIA:  That's very sweet. The power of healing grandma.

AMANDA:  "Now, besides healing her injury, she also believed in a lot of odd little things, many of which are just old wives' tales, now that I see as an adult. But she did think my cousin could communicate with spirits and had a portal in his bedroom."

JULIA:  Oh, no. Not the bedroom. Communicate with spirits? Sure, fine. Whatever.

AMANDA:   We don't need a speed dial.

JULIA:  A portal in the bedroom, hmm, that's just Paranormal Activity 3, and I hate that.

AMANDA:  I hate that, too. "My third and final story is about my haunted childhood home. So growing up, we lived in a very, very old house. It was made from scrap wood from barns and the remaining railroad tracks that were just lying around our town."

JULIA:  Great.

AMANDA:  "We heard many strange footsteps at night. Things moved and got lost, even when you put them in a place that you could easily find and remember. And occasionally—"

JULIA:  That's just ADHD, baby.

AMANDA:  But, Julia, how about this? "Occasionally, my siblings and I just got pushed down the stairs."

JULIA:  Oh! Just casually got pushed down the stairs, huh? Just casually? Like, "Oh yeah, things would go missing. We'd hear creaks in the night, and also we'd get pushed down some stairs."

AMANDA:  Aaah! No, hate that.

JULIA:  Hate that.

AMANDA:  "The majority of the hauntings happen upstairs where our bedrooms were. One summer, my dad had to go up into our attic, which is more of a crawl space than an actual story, and check on something for the house. When he got up there, he told us that he found a door that had been used as a part of the ceiling. So, like, the door was scrap wood, basically."

JULIA:  Oh.

AMANDA:  "But was, like, used as, like, a ceiling panel."

JULIA:  Like they went to the dump, they got a door there, and then they used it as part of the ceiling, in making the wooden ceiling

AMANDA:  Yes. But here's the thing, Julia.

JULIA:  Uh-hmm.

AMANDA:  "The doorknob was still attached to the door and it was unlocked."

JULIA:  I think someone's just being funny. Someone who built that house was like, "You know what would be fucking hilarious?"

AMANDA:  I mean, you need a trap door to get into the attic. That's not what this was.

JULIA:  Uh-hmm.

AMANDA:  This is just like a door—

JULIA:  Uh-hmm.

AMANDA:  —like nailed in.

JULIA:  Just a door.

AMANDA:  "However, jokingly, dad locked the doorknob and came back down." Now, Julia, why would this be a bad idea?

JULIA:  I just— I think maybe the ghosts who are using that as a way of getting in and out of the house. Now, you've cut off their passageway, and they're gonna be pissed.

AMANDA:  Excellent supposition. "But for the next few nights, there were no strange noises, no moved objects, no one being pushed randomly. And so my siblings and I firmly believe that by locking that door in the ceiling, dad closed off the spirits from our home."

JULIA:  So did it stop completely after that? That's my question, then. It's like— you say for the next few nights.

AMANDA:  Uh-hmm. 

JULIA:  —but then did—

AMANDA:  Or did they find a workaround somehow?

JULIA:  Yeah, that's what I'm thinking. I'm like— it's like, when you get locked out of your house and you're like, "All right. Where— do I have a spare key somewhere?"

JULIA:  "Maybe I can—"

AMANDA:  Like crawling the bathroom, right?

JULIA:  Yeah. "Maybe I can open, like, a window that we left unlocked or something like that. My mom has a spare key at her house. I'll just go over there and get that." You know, I think the ghost probably found a workaround—

AMANDA:  Uh-hmm.

JULIA:  —if it still continued after those couple of days, but it might have just stopped completely.

AMANDA:  I would love to know. That's the end from Tori. She does say she has a few more stories like "The time I saw my grandpa's ghost in the bathroom, me predicting his death, and being visited by my other grandpa based on the smell of his cigar and sawdust, that I'll write in sometime soon."

JULIA:  Okay. Yes. As we've said, many a time you're teasing us with these, "Oh, I'll write in more later." I want them all now. I want them all now. Uh-hmm.

AMANDA:  I want them all now, whether you call our brand-new number or you write in. Julia, I'm so excited to have done 100 of these. I am so excited to do many, many more, and I'm excited to hear about all of your stories, ConSpiriters. We couldn't do it without you.

JULIA:  We really couldn't. And we are so grateful that we get to do more and more and more of these in the near future. It's gonna be great. I am so excited for, like, what the future holds with all of these, so more spooky stuff in the future coming your way.

AMANDA:  Exactly. Have a great Halloween, everybody. Stay safe, stay spooky. But as you know, it's just the beginning of spooky season around here, because we'll be seeing you every Wednesday for the rest of time.

JULIA:  The rest of time.

AMANDA:  Even after the podcast finishes, eventually we'll haunt you.

JULIA:  The ghosts of us will still be on the internet. Stay creepy.

AMANDA:  Stay cool.

JULIA:  Later, satyrs.

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